I got to make thing right, but I don't want to hurt anyone.

[minniemoocher]

So here’s the thing.

 

I’ve met a boy, Trav, 3 years ago and we became best friends right from the start. We went out almost every day and he fell in love with me, but at that time I wasn’t ready for a relationship so we remained friends as he still wanted to be a friend, because he understood me.

 

As the time passed by I finally fell in love. But not with him, but with his best friend, Mark. I did not tell anyone, because I knew that Trav did still loved me, so didn't want to hurt him. Mark was so so similar to Trav almost the same person, but Mark was/is a lot prettier to me.

 

(I don't want to write an essay so I cut it short.)

 

Mark texted me first and we had our first chat and then the second and so on. After a while we became so close, that Mark told me that he loves me and I said I love him too. Thats how it was for about 4 months and then the relationship went boring for me, sadly. I told him just to be friends and he said ok, but we still have sex from time to time and I know that Mark still loves me, so that's how it is right now.

 

And right now I realised afrer a year from throwing Trav over board, that it was so rude from me and so childish. Right now I just realised how much things we did together and how I was so releaved and comfy all the time. It was so much better than with Mark, but I was so starry eyed because of love.

 

I am still in touch with Trav, we sometimes chat about things, but thats max. once a month.

 

So here's the question:

What should I do to get Trav back and don't do the same thing to Mark as I did to Trav before?

 

I don't want to hurt anyone no more! I just want to be with Trav and that is my final decision.

I know I did so wrong, but now I have to get it right. Please help me!!!

[Starshine]

I am not sure that is such good idea. Please don't mind It's just from an outside person's point of View. You fell in love with a guy (Mark) who was a friend of the guy (Trav) who actually loved you. And now you don't want that guy you want the other one. Does Trav (as you say), know about you and Mark and how would he feel if he knows about your change of heart.

You need to think about what is your status quo on your relationship with Mark and if you really want something with Trav or is it just a passing interest. Firstly be clear with Mark and you need to tell him exactly how you feel if you say he still loves you, he has the right to know...

Secondly with Trav don't proceed forward with matters unless you are pretty sure of things...You do not want to lose a friend... And if you still feel that you want to take things forward with Trav cut off Mark completely and give yourself a break...You don't want to rebound for Trav either. Stay on the single status for sometimes and keep talking to Trav as a friend and then take things forth after giving thought to things some more.

[Andrina]

Trav will never be okay with you boinking his friend. That thought will always be stuck in his mind and it's something you cannot keep from him. The truth will come out one way or another. Your future man lies elsewhere.