Wants me to make her work for attention?

[RyanJC]

This girl I'm dating told me that she loves working for attention and then getting it, as aposed to me just giving it too her, apparently working for it turns her on or something, this is the first time This has come up

 

This isn't really my style? What is she asking for here and how do I go about doing it?

[Wiseman2]

It could mean you are smothering her.

Recently she called it off again, this time saying she needs to find herself before she can concentrate on me, fair enough, but she keeps messing me around on where we stand! One day she says its not to late for us and that everything will be fine once she'/ sorted hereself out and the next she says she doesn't know if she'll be interested by then? She won't talk to me half the time even though I know she's on her phone, it's killing me but I don't want to walk away!

[zeino]

She sounds like she has a submissive temperament in these things. If she is vanilla, then she is probably attracted to more macho, overtly alpha male styles that give acception and recognition not so readily. If she is kinky, she may want a "dom" but I think she would tell this to you so she is vanilla I reckon. You don't have to act in any way that feels unnatural to your temeperament. You sound like you are more inclined toward what you perceive as equal, mutual recognition. I would say speak about sexuality openly, asking her what she exactly means, its limits etc and leave if these don't suit you.

[pippy longstocking]

just move on .....when someone has to tell you how to be then it is not a match ...she is a sub ....she wants you to be a dom ...you are not ..so don't waste your time mate .

[Edmund Exley]

just move on .....when someone has to tell you how to be then it is not a match ...she is a sub ....she wants you to be a dom ...you are not ..so don't waste your time mate .

 

What the fair lady said.

[pippy longstocking]

She sounds like she has a submissive temperament in these things. If she is vanilla, then she is probably attracted to more macho, overtly alpha male styles that give acception and recognition not so readily. If she is kinky, she may want a "dom" but I think she would tell this to you so she is vanilla I reckon. You don't have to act in any way that feels unnatural to your temeperament. You sound like you are more inclined toward what you perceive as equal, mutual recognition. I would say speak about sexuality openly, asking her what she exactly means, its limits etc and leave if these don't suit you.

 

oh I missed this ...so yes you think the same too

[zeino]

Yes. But I will vote for vanilla.

 

I enjoyed the ENA stats on this one.

 

Wiseman: "Smothering."

 

Zeino: kink/Vanilla.

 

Pippy: sub/Dom.

 

I love it how women have these radars

[pippy longstocking]

Yes. But I will vote for vanilla.

 

I enjoyed the ENA stats on this one.

 

Wiseman: "Smothering."

 

Zeino: kink/Vanilla.

 

Pippy: sub/Dom.

 

I love it how women have these radars

 

I find it interesting as well ...not just this thread , the different take on things fascinates me .

[Capricorn3]

Is this the same girl who you want to change, and try and save her and fix her etc who wanted space and ended things with you? You sound very controlling. I don't think she's the problem here.

[SherrySher]

My take on it...it sounds messed up. End of story.

[Zaphod]

I'd send her out for grocery shopping, get her to paint your house and then rebuild your car engine, and then promise her she can maybe have some attention in return.

 

But that's just me.