What to do?

[Minion1]

So to make it a quick story, I've been somewhat talking to this girl for a little over a month now. We text everyday pretty much, but for the most part I'm the one that initiates the conversation. She usually replies most of the time but sometimes she can be a little short with her replies and stuff, although we have had some serious conversations. Since talking, I've asked her to hang out on two different occasions and she agreed, and both times (nothing serious, just dinner) things seemed to go pretty well. We talked a lot and made jokes and stuff; all normal. After each "date", we seem to talk more than normal for a couple of days and then it always seems to go back to the cold side meaning I don't actually hear from her during the day until I finally text her in the evening and get some replies and everything. I basically can't read her, it seems to go hot when we hang out and then following day or so after and then it goes cold after that..short replies and then times with no real reply at all. I'm basically confused as to what to do, should I just leave it alone or just assume she probably has a guard up and be persistent about it. I should also mention, we both just got out of serious relationships several months back. Any help is definitely appreciated!

[Ms Darcy]

Texting with a guy every day for a month is tedious.

 

Focus on having real life dates. That's how you get to know someone.

[gebaird]

If the dates are good and the texts aren't, she could just be a bad texter -- or busy. Would talking on the phone with her from time to time maybe help you create a deeper connection?

[Minion1]

I have considered that she may be busy a lot, which I'm sure she is. Some days I'll even get several snap chats and stuff from her but not much texting, so I'm not sure what to think. I'm not exactly sure how to go about talking on the phone, I rarely do that with anyone I've just been pretty much a "texter".

 

Regarding real life dates; I've definitely suggested it each time (which she agrees) and I could be thinking in too deep on it, but it slightly feels like she's just saying yes just because. Over analyzing texts is definitely something I do, but I do sometimes feel like she's just agreeing for the sake of it and not really that interested.

[gebaird]

I'm not exactly sure how to go about talking on the phone, I rarely do that with anyone I've just been pretty much a "texter".

 

See if you can find out how she prefers to communicate. Be willing to be flexible.

 

Over analyzing texts is definitely something I do

 

This is why a richer communication medium may be needed (face-to-face, skype/facetime or phone). It offers additional clues (tone, body language) about the meaning behind the words.

 

I love the convenience of texting, but it can't replace real conversation.

[Wiseman2]

Unfortunately this is friendzoning behavior. Are you looking to date her or just a text-buddy and hang-outs?

 

If you are not suggesting dates at least weekly, she's probably losing interest at the speed of light and wondering why you are even bothering her with texting all the time.

 

Why only 2 hang-outs in over a month? She must think you're not very interested if all you do is text all day and only suggested hanging out a couple of times. You don't sound very interested. Is she dating other guys?

I've been somewhat talking to this girl for a little over a month now. We text everyday. I've asked her to hang out on two different occasions and she agreed. it seems to go hot when we hang out and then following day or so after and then it goes cold after that.