Don't know how to handle this

[RyanJC]

Disclaimer: I love this girl, and I truly want to help her

 

So I'm dating this girl, We get on great and there's a definite spark.

 

I know she's been having some other issues with Family and what she want's to do with her life recently (Uni/ Career, Ex's etc) but everytime I approach the subject to try and help she shuts me out, Once or twice she's called it off too avoid the subject!

 

Recently she called it off again, this time saying she needs to find herself before she can concentrate on me, fair enough, but she keeps messing me around on where we stand! One day she says its not to late for us and that everything will be fine once she'/ sorted hereself out and the next she says she doesn't know if she'll be interested by then?

 

She won't talk to me half the time even though I know she's on her phone, it's killing me but I don't want to walk away!

 

I'm getting hurt and don't know what to do

[DaNgeRTasTiC]

Rough situation. That is something that has always bothered me...

 

People that are abused or neglected yet still continue to chase after the person that can't stand them.

 

I don't know your situation very well but if she is doing it then by all means do the sMe thing she does.

 

Are you guys exclusive or not together? I learned long ago that people that play games tend to care more about YOU if you act like you don't give a about them. Stupid as it sounds....it works

[Wiseman2]

Sorry to say, but she's right. You are not there to fix her because she's not broken. Tip: everybody hates unsolicited tips on how they should be.

 

It's arrogant to want to "help her" because in reality you want to fix and change her. It's very invasive and controlling and she's right to end it and shut you down.

I know she's been having some other issues with Family and what she want's to do with her life recently (Uni/ Career, Ex's etc) but everytime I approach the subject to try and help she shuts me out, Once or twice she's called it off too avoid the subject!

[RyanJC]

Sorry to say, but she's right. You are not there to fix her because she's not broken. Tip: everybody hates unsolicited tips on how they should be.

 

It's arrogant to want to "help her" because in reality you want to fix and change her. It's very invasive and controlling and she's right to end it and shut you down.

 

In my defence, She has straight up told me she's having these issues, Is it so wrong to eant to try and help in any way I can?

 

The last thing I want to do is change her, She's asked me to change some things which I've done but i've never done the same

[Wiseman2]

Yes because she's told you repeatedly she "needs space" to figure it out and she has shut you down repeatedly for your clearly unwanted "help". She told you she has issues as an excuse to break up hoping you'll get off her case.

IShe has straight up told me she's having these issues, Is it so wrong to eant to try and help in any way I can?

[DancingFool]

She doesn't need to be saved and she has made this crystal clear to you. Please respect that and butt out.

She is not messing you around at all, she has been brutally blunt with you that she doesn't want your help, whatever that is. You are not hearing her and that's not attractive.