Just attraction or possibly more ?

[reservedm]

Past history - I have had several horrible relationships back to back before dating this lady now.

 

Current History - First saw her, 3yrs ago at my old job but I had a girlfriend then. We never spoke. On a good evening at a bar, a friend said he was going to introduce me to a girl. To my surprise it was her! I knew her but she didn't know of me because I never say anything to her in the past. We have been dating for 3months, been intimate in the last 1 month. She is great and has her life together. Sex is great. Everything seem awesome. We are both in our late 20s.

 

Issue - I feel i am attracted to her but I don't feel that spark or adrenaline rush. I can't say the word " I can't live without you".

 

Has anyone experience this? She seem like a good catch and nice person. I wouldn't want to ruin something that can potential become everything.

[Andrina]

Yes, you can find a person attractive and not have chemistry. I know when I was a teen, I told my friend I wish I felt chemistry with her brother, because he was such a kindhearted person and would make a great bf. No, I wouldn't continue dating a person I didn't feel a spark with. If she knew how you felt, do you really think she'd want to stay with you? Free her so she can find a person who is crazy about her. You only have one life to live, so I'd recommend going for it all-someone you have a spark with AND is great otherwise. She's not the last woman on the planet, and in essence, you would be settling.

[Wiseman2]

Unfortunately it sounds like you are into this for the high of novelty/infatuation. Not much you can do if you don't want to get in exclusive relationship mode.

been intimate in the last 1 month.Sex is great.I feel i am attracted to her but I don't feel that spark or adrenaline rush.

[Jibralta]

Issue - I feel i am attracted to her but I don't feel that spark or adrenaline rush. I can't say the word " I can't live without you".

 

To me, these are both aspects of chemistry, two shades of the same color. One is the run-of-the-mill variety, the other is an amped-up version.

 

We all think with two "brains." We have the brain that only wants to reproduce, and the brain that actually thinks. If you feel like you can't live without someone after three months, you can bet your a$$ that your rational brain isn't the one doing the thinking. Don't confuse that feeling with love, especially if you would like to have a life partner.

 

I've chased amped-up chemistry around quite a bit, because it was fun, and because I couldn't resist. But I have found that it's really just a phase and that it fades, leaving you with a person who is considerably less awesome than they first appeared.

 

If you want someone to share your life with, chemistry should be there. But equally, if not more important, are friendship, mutual respect, affection, honesty, responsibility, etc. Believe me, when you have those things in a relationship, you will really see what it's like to know that you can't live without your partner. Good relationships are so important, especially as you get older.

 

If you believe in "true love" and "the one," then there's nothing I can say to help you.

[reservedm]

To me, these are both aspects of chemistry, two shades of the same color. One is the run-of-the-mill variety, the other is an amped-up version.

 

We all think with two "brains." We have the brain that only wants to reproduce, and the brain that actually thinks. If you feel like you can't live without someone after three months, you can bet your a$$ that your rational brain isn't the one doing the thinking. Don't confuse that feeling with love, especially if you would like to have a life partner.

 

I've chased amped-up chemistry around quite a bit, because it was fun, and because I couldn't resist. But I have found that it's really just a phase and that it fades, leaving you with a person who is considerably less awesome than they first appeared.

 

If you want someone to share your life with, chemistry should be there. But equally, if not more important, are friendship, mutual respect, affection, honesty, responsibility, etc. Believe me, when you have those things in a relationship, you will really see what it's like to know that you can't live without your partner. Good relationships are so important, especially as you get older.

 

If you believe in "true love" and "the one," then there's nothing I can say to help you.

 

I believe in true love and the one.

[Jibralta]

I believe in true love and the one.

 

I thought maybe you did!