Need to get this out

[em123]

I need a therapist but I'm moving so this is my things to get out for today. (this is going to be long).

 

I'm depressed. My landlord keeps pushing the date. And my dads super abusive always has been. My boyfriend who lives with me is just now realizing how on edge I am. I can't take much more of living here. Ik patience is a good thing. But it's been two months since she said I could move in and sign the lease. I'm frustrated. I cry every night. My boyfriend has to work. And I'm stuck here alone the majority of the day. I'm mentally ill. I'm disabled. But the problem is my minds fed up with the abusiveness and lies. I'm trying my hardest to get out of here. There is absolutely no where for me to go. And-due to the fact of my stupidity as a younger teen- my probation officer can't do anything. I'm stuck. My landlord is working as fast as she can. She's got 8 tenets. But I'm so lost in this house. I'm so down. I'm trying to be as patient as I can... But it's wearing thin. And a lot of the suicide hotline doesn't help. Because in reality : I need a hug. I need someone to comfort me and let me cry on their shoulder. I cried for a half hour last night non stop. I'm actually hating my life. And my one friend is grieving over our friend who past away. She won't talk to me. She doesn't know I knew her as well. Then you got the other whose phone is getting repaired and she lives another couple towns over. Then I have bullies at school. Then I have people who cyberbully me and call me disgusting for my past. I was raped and didn't know how to deal with it so I did stupid stuff. Which they find out about somehow what I did. But they don't know why I did it. I'm so lost. And I hate every minute of it. Please if someone is out there.... Please help me. I'm so lost. No one really cares about me. Please....

[smackie9]

Welcome I'm so sorry you are going through a tough time. If you are still in school, they do provide counseling. From there they can help set you up with a social worker to help you to get you out of your situation, provide a safe place to live, and free counseling. There are social programs available to you. Check out your local health and welfare website to gain access to what is available to you. Please make an appointment with a school counselor...this first step will make all the difference.

[em123]

Thank you smackie9 that was amazing advice