If I got dumped, why is he the one always trying to contact me again?

[silently]

He broke up with me so I stopped contacting him for obvious reasons. I havent initiated any sort of contact since...yet he's text me 3 separate times in the past 3 months. Why is he still contacting me?! (Usually the messages are just like "how have you been, I hope you're okay, how are things going? I'm always here if you need anything xx" ...)

[rich46]

He broke up with me so I stopped contacting him for obvious reasons. I havent initiated any sort of contact since...yet he's text me 3 separate times in the past 3 months. Why is he still contacting me?! (Usually the messages are just like "how have you been, I hope you're okay, how are things going? I'm always here if you need anything xx" ...)

Some dumpers are like that.

 

They want to keep you hanging by a thread. A safety net.

 

They don't want you, but they don't want you to move on just in case they change their mind and/or their rebound doesn't work out.

 

They may also be feeling guilty for hurting the one they loved, and trying to come across as the 'nice guy' will help to appease this guilt.

 

Have you been replying to the texts? If so, then stop doing so and he will eventually get the message.

[Andrina]

It's actually another cruel trait from their demented selves that they do this. It's happened to me and countless others and doesn't mean anything special. What would I do? Reply with: We have no reason to communicate. Delete my number. If he continues, block his number if you can and if you can't block it, ignore the text.

[ThatwasThen]

Do you answer him? If you do, then that would be why he keeps at it. If you don't answer him then why not just block him so he can't continue to rent space in your thoughts for free?

[Wiseman2]

Because you haven't blocked him and made your boundaries and position clear. Do that and let it be known that breadcrumbs or being pitied or in his fan club/hookup corral is not for you.

 

Be smart and block, delete totally from phone, social media...everything. Not only for your self-respect but to move on and heal.

 

Start spending your time more effectively by getting some nice pics and a profile together on dating apps and browsing who else is out there for you. Keep busy investing in your own life and happiness, not pondering his post breakup motives for nonsense texts.

He broke up...yet he's text me 3 separate times in the past 3 months. Why is he still contacting me?

[HeartGoesOn]

Shut that final door...problem solved.

[silently]

I also realized that he text me the day after I posted a picture with a guy I've been getting close with recently on Snapchat that he'd viewed. I figure he's either trying to figure out who this new guy is or he's come to rub something in my face. Thanks for all the advice!