Ultimatums

[Alone16]

Just recently found out I'm pregnant and my boyfriend who has 6 kids and is 45 gave me an ultimatum saying I had to choose to either be with him or abortion. I'm confused because I told him we had to be careful when having sex and the one time he did not use protection was the day prior to my weight loss surgery. I'm afraid something will be wrong with the baby but I'm also afraid of having an abortion and I feel like he is going to leave anyway. I have been crying like crazy and last night I started cramping extremely bad. I'm 5 weeks age 41 and my cramps are getting stronger. I don't have a appetite and I can't sleep. Please any and all advice welcomed.

[Seraphim]

I would visit the ER and see if there is anything wrong. I am sorry.

[Wiseman2]

Do what's right for you. Never get strong-armed into a decision. How long have you been dating? What is the level of your relationship? casual, fwb, exclusive dating? living together?

 

You need to see a doctor asap and perhaps get counselling as to what you want to do. He will have to pay child support but he doesn't have to be part of your life. Agree it sounds like he may leave anyway.

Just recently found out I'm pregnant and my boyfriend who has 6 kids and is 45 gave me an ultimatum saying I had to choose to either be with him or abortion. I'm 5 weeks age 41 and my cramps are getting stronger.

[moodindigo91]

Go see a doctor ASAP, at age 41, you are more likely to have complications if you decide to carry the baby to term. Without support, you might want to consider aborting and leaving your boyfriend and obtaining counseling.

[abitbroken]

I'm confused because I told him we had to be careful when having sex and the one time he did not use protection was the day prior to my weight loss surgery.

 

Ok. First off, it is equally your responsibility to use protection. Telling him "we have to be careful" is not the same thing as "We have to be careful, so I am going to not have sex with you today. I can't risk a pregnancy and I am at the fertile time of the month." Or "Condom and spermicide or no sex". The "He didn't use protection" is bs. YOU didn't use protection. So own it and in the future, take a little more control.

 

That being said, I would go to the doctor. You could be having a miscarriage. MANY MANY 41 year old women have full term healthy pregnancies. If any man told me that I have to have an abortion or lose him, I would say "goodbye".

[tattoobunnie]

If you're only 5 weeks along, and your cramps are progressing, something is wrong. Go to the doctor right away.