Please help.

[Laur123]

Ok so me(22) and my girlfriend(19) have been going out for 4 years.. The relationship was probably toxic to say the least we both cheated on eachother, especially me because I have a drink problem but we were both young and stupid. About a month and a half ago we finished I had sex with someone else(while drunk) and immediately regretted it. I knew I had to tell her but I actually contemplated killing myself because I thought she would leave me for good but the weird thing about it all is that she didn't. Although she was absolutely heartbroken. The majority of our relationship throughout the last 4 years has been outstanding. We've been on 5* star holidays we both treated eachother with the most respect in the world. But when drink was involved things went from the best to worst. Anyway, after I had sex with someone else she got back with me.. I told her I didn't want to get back for awhile and she begged me to get back with her.. I did. A week after this we went away for the weekend a month after this we went on holidays but then the trouble started happening.. Her friend commuted suicide about 2 weeks after we came home. I wasn't able to make it to the removal she told me that night she was going to sleep but I found out later that she actually went to an after party with people she just met at the removal.. These people are junkies btw... Which is just completely out of charecter for my girlfriend she's honestly so respectable and classy. She turned off her phone for two weeks she was staying in the junkies flat for this whole time- didn't go to college didn't go to work.. Just non-stop drinking. She text me to tell me she had been with someone in the house and didn't want to be with me anymore.. I tried absolutely everything to get her back. I'm heartbroken. She blocked me on eveything I've no contact with her. The worst thing about it is that I don't even mind that she doesn't want to get back with me... It's the fact that I'm worried that I'll wake up some day and she will be dead.. She pushed me and all of her close friends away too hang around with these scumbags she just met... She said she loves them because they all lost her friend as well. Oh and btw the house that she's been partying in is the house were the boy killed himself... I can't stress enough how out of charecter this is... What am I supposed to do?

[Edmund Exley]

Young and stupid is not an excuse. Work on yourself before attempting a relationship with others.

[Wiseman2]

Leave her alone and go no contact. You have zero respect for her. She can choose her own friends. Block her on everything. See if your drinking and cheating will create future problems with whomever you date and try to improve that.

I have a drink problem. I had sex with someone else. She text me to tell me she had been with someone in the house and didn't want to be with me anymore.She blocked me on eveything I've no contact with her.

[ZINO247]

Hi There.

 

You are both really young.

I think you need to focus on your mental state whilst not drinking, and that would mean keeping a distance from your ex until you become strong enough in yourself to not drink to those states. I think you should work on yourself before getting into any other forms of relationships,

 

Secondly does your ex girlfriend have any friends (who are not in the junkies house), siblings or family members you could tell to help her out of this experience. Is there someone other than you that she can honestly rely on and trust.

If there is I would think about telling that person what your ex is going through, and how her action are out of character.

[moodindigo91]

I'm sorry but at 22 years old, you shouldn't be anywhere near a drinking problem. How did it get there? If you spent your last 4 years in a toxic relationship, that'll do it.

 

She's toxic to you and you to her. I've learned this recently myself, toxic relationships will make you feel miserable, suicidal in the long run, but when things are good they are SO GOOD, making it so hard to leave. It's like a drug. Let her make whatever mistakes she's going to make, you should focus on getting help with your drinking problem because you're way too young for that kind of crap.

[HeartGoesOn]

What am I supposed to do?

 

To put in bluntly, walk away from this nonsense. As the saying goes, "Not my monkeys, not my circus."

[Wolfshook]

Honestly, it seems you have a lot bigger problems to solve than these problems with her.