Talking again...

[Jovahutc]

After four months apart I had experienced turmoil. It took some time but I began to regain myself and feel happy again. After all the madness, after all the grief I felt- I actually began to feel normal again. I focused on me and began to learn to love myself. I picked myself, my heart off the ground and began piecing me back together.

I knew at some point me and my ex would have to start talking again- after all I needed to know everything that was going on with my child. She texted, I called, we started talking again. There was a brief talk about the way things went down, only brief. But I wasn't angry anymore, I wasn't upset with her, I wasn't bitter. We could just talk again. In the back of my mind I had wondered if talking in any form was a bad idea; I'm so weak in the knees still for this woman. All I can think about is that I loved her; that she was the only woman I had ever truly loved. All I can think about is how much I wanted us to be a family. But I wasn't happy- it could have worked if only I was happy and if she was too. I know what I need to do; but I don't know at this point if I am willing to let the idea go that she can still be the one. I hate that I even said that; but I can't deny its all I keep thinking about. She and my child are all I can think about. Is this wrong- am I completely screwed up...

[Wiseman2]

Eventually for the sake of your child you must start seeing the child and communicating about the child. Be a great dad and put any 'weak in the knees" feelings aside.

 

Good you are doing better and keeping relationship talks as brief as possible, so you can focus on your child.

I wasn't happy- it could have worked if only I was happy and if she was too. She and my child are all I can think about. Is this wrong- am I completely screwed up...