Don't know why she's pissed at me, or if we should be friends.

[22andhungry]

So I started dating a girl a couple of months ago and we became really close we tell each other everything talk everyday and hang out every week. She's known that I like her but hasn't said rather she feels the same way or not. So I eventually got tired of waiting on her to reciprocate my feelings and honestly I'm not sure she's emotionally secure enough to do it yet. Her last bf cheated on her for 7 years and they just broke off last year.

 

So I decided to cut her off we haven't hung out in a couple of weeks and I don't text her anymore. So the other night she text me saying she's hurt I don't want to be her friend anymore and wondering why I don't talk to her ect.

 

My question is why is she pissed/upset at me? Does she really expect me to stick around and be friends forever? I'm not sure that's a good idea if I like her and she just sees me as a friend at the end of the day.

 

Also what should I say to her? It's been a day and I still haven't responded I'm truly stumped here and I do care about her.!

[Inner Fire]

Did you tell her you decided not to be her friend before not talking to her for two weeks? Because if not, that's why she's upset. If so, then she is upset simply because the two of you formed a connection and she misses it.

 

You need to be straight with her - tell her that you don't want to get too emotionally involved if she's not ready yet, that you can't invest into a friendship with someone you have romantic feelings for. There's nothing wrong with backing off from a friendship when the feelings are not on equal terms. You just need to be honest.

[ParisPaulette]

Does she really expect me to stick around and be friends forever? I'm not sure that's a good idea if I like her and she just sees me as a friend at the end of the day.

 

Probably. You need to simply send a text stating that this was turning into a holding pattern, you're looking for a relationship though, so you have decided to focus your attention on dating other women and finding someone who wants more. And then you leave it at that.

 

And no, you don't have to be friends just because someone else says. And no, you won't likely get the girl by being that silent long-suffering "friend" like in the movies. It sounds like you're both wanting different things, just tell her that, then end contact and move on.

[Wiseman2]

It sounds like you broke up and went no contact and she wanted to be friends? Did you explicitly break up or just disappear?

 

Tell her how you feel, what you want and that you are not in this for the friendzone.

I decided to cut her off we haven't hung out in a couple of weeks and I don't text her anymore. So the other night she text me saying she's hurt I don't want to be her friend anymore and wondering why I don't talk to her ect.

[22andhungry]

I kind of slowly stopped contacting her, no I didn't tell her why. Yesterday I did though and she said she was too afraid of another broken heart right now. I let her know I understand but I couldn't just sit around and wait on her to open up to me. Honestly I feel really bad for her, sucks that a few bad guys can mess up really nice girls. I don't see any other choice though.