Afraid of loving someone?

[LadyYouth]

For a little over a year, I've been best friends with an online person and spoken with him essentially every day, all day. We offered each other support through some of the lowest times in our lives - him losing his mother to suicide, my not finishing college and losing my home, and have just been listening ears for everything that has happened.

 

Recently, we told each other we were in love, and have begun dating. It's made me happy, but it also keeps me awake sometimes. We'll be meeting in a couple months for a few weeks - we live a few states a part and have to collect money .

 

Every other time I've gotten close to someone, they've left, and being this attached hurts.

 

He always promises he cares a lot and says how much I matter to him, and that he wants to make me a priority. I tell him the same, and it really hurts to admit that. He promises he'll always be here for me, and that he doesn't want to lose me. I've never had anyone fear losing me before, and god, do I fear losing him. We both have anxiety and depressive feelings, and I have a lot of insecurities, and he always tries to assuage mine and absolutely spoils me. I always try my best to cheer him up, and let him know he's appreciated. But just...ah.

 

I'm afraid of how happy he makes me, because I can't accept the fact that someday it will all be over. The worst part is, he says he is plagued by similar thoughts.

 

How do I get over this?

[NightLily]

Well, I think this is partly because right now the relationship is still not realistic or in person. You will need some time together physically to probably hash out these feelings and get your relationship feeling more established.

[dave_1966]

Please don't part with any money in case he's scamming you and isn't who he says he is, and when you first meet him take a friend along for a little while.

[Wiseman2]

Did you meet on a dating app? Be careful and try to check him out through research to see if he is who he says he is. You have never met so you don't even know who you are in love with or attached to.

 

Agree be careful about money and if you meet use great precaution.

I've been best friends with an online person and spoken with him essentially every day, all day.we told each other we were in love. We'll be meeting in a couple months for a few weeks - we live a few states a part and have to collect money.

[reinventmyself]

You referred to dating and then said you were to meet him soon.

Have you met him in person yet?