What is love...??

[OldRomantic83]

Ok, I have a question for all you fine people on here... what is love...? How do you define it? What does it mean to each every one of you? And if you saw something that made you think 'that is love'... what would it be? I'm genuinely interested to know.

[IAmFCA]

Do you mean love as one might have in a marriage? Love is a broad term, not as precise as it may seem.

 

Love for my community, for my family, for my friends, for my life partner: all of it emanates from a respect of the human experience, and an appreciation that all of us are dealing with a short deck.

[Wiseman2]

I think there are different types and different levels.

what is love...? How do you define it?

]

]

[Seraphim]

A deep feeling of affinity and respect for someone. There is physical attraction. Wanting to spend your life with someone. Devotion. Compromise. Common goals,

 

Lots of things.

[IAmFCA]

A deep feeling of affinity and respect for someone. There is physical attraction. Wanting to spend your life with someone. Devotion. Compromise. Common goals,

 

Lots of things.

 

Adding,

 

A desire to honor that person.

[SherrySher]

I am guessing here that you mean romantic love. What it means to me is that it is something that does not happen until you are very involved with someone and it has been long term, (anything less is infatuation) you have spent a great deal of time with that person and have built a very good friendship that is built on mutual respect and loyalty and being good to each other in every way, and obviously are mutually attracted to one another but are respectful of that and only share that with each other. You build one another up and have added happiness to each other's lives. Love is cherishing that person and being devoted to them.

 

There is no abuse, or massively negative aspects or things of that nature, as that is not love.

[TMifune]

The Greeks have 6 words for love:

1. Eros, or sexual passion
   
2. Philia, or deep friendship
   
3. Ludus, or playful love
   
4. Agape, or love for everyone
   
5. Pragma, or longstanding love
   
6. Philautia, or love of the self
   

 

]

 

It's worth understanding what they are and why they had 6.

[Capricorn3]

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

 

(I remember that from someone's wedding).

[mustlovedogs]

Edit: Wiseman, how do you upload gifs?

 

I had a what is love, baby don't hurt me meme... Haha.

[rayfutz]

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

 

(I remember that from someone's wedding).

 

I agree with this Bible quote. My personal belief is love defines God, and his characteristics in themselves are what love is. If I come from a Biblical perspective, my definition of love is based on what the Bible says it is. If I base my definition on things not in the Bible, then I am talking a world view that borrows from the Biblical view, and so the end result will be reading books and watching movies to try to understand what love it. Sorry to be preachy but a straight answer from me is Love is defined clearly to me through this verse, and when I feel confused, I just come back to it and read it.

[Sportster2005]

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

 

(I remember that from someone's wedding).

 

It's from Corinthians 13:4-7 Which is ironic. Even agnostics and anesthetists use it. I only find it interesting and an not inviting yet another Internet debate on religion. It's a beautiful passage, and one of the most romantic things written.

[Sportster2005]

I'm actually stuck answering this. Kind of sad. When I think of love, the strongest I feel is for my children. I would kill or be killed to ensure their survival. There isn't a thing I wouldn't do for them. My love for them is unquestionable and unwavering. I don't think it's possible to feel this way about anyone else.

 

I was on a bluff overlooking the ocean at sunset. My girlfriend was at me at the time. She said something silly. She had her own language. I usually found it annoying. But this time when she said it I thought it was cute. It was just so her. I turned to look at her. I knew that was the moment I fell in love with her. We were at the nine month mark. After that she just didn't feel like a girlfriend. She felt like a close friend. Someone I wanted to be around and enjoy. Unfortunately it ended shortly after. That's how I came to be here. I was upset. I didn't cry though until a couple of evenings later. It was Thursday. We almost always saw each other Thursday evening. It hit me like a ton of bricks. The phone wasn't going to ring like it had every Thursday for months. I wouldn't hear her voice. I cried. I felt alone and empty. I sometimes think love is more simple than we make it to be. All I wanted was the phone to ring, hear her voice, and then go to her place, and simply be with her. No mystery.

 

I met my wife in the 80s. It was time for me to grow up. She was a good catch. I liked her, and found her attractive. I left her after I changed trades in the military. We were both still relatively young. She was in university still. We decided to end it when I left. It was very unlikely that after this course I would be posted back. When the plane was taxiing I looked out the window. I could see her on the edge of the tarmac waving good bye. I couldn't cry openly. I was a young man in uniform on a plane with other young men in uniform. My heart was breaking. Tears did manage to escape. And it love seems so simple when I look back on this. It was just that feeling of wanting to be with someone. Someone that became part of your world. The thought of never seeing her again was unbearable at that moment. I did get posted back. We married. We fell out of love. No all love lasts forever.

 

I first saw her a few years ago in a club. I fell in love with her instantly. People don't believe in love at first site. Next.

 

I was leaving the cafe yesterday. I heard my name being called. I turned. It was the closest friend in my life. We have known each other since teenagers. We have been through a lot together. We have witnessed each other's triumphs, and we have witnessed each other's spectacular falls. We make no real effort at keeping in touch. It's understood we can go our own ways, and our paths will always lead back to one another. We go months and years without contact. We quickly caught up. I met his girlfriend. We hugged and said I love you. We made vague plans to get together soon. Maybe we will, maybe we won't. Love is sometimes a bond forged by sharing mutual pains and victories.

 

Love is simply a feeling. Maybe we shouldn't analyze it. Feel it and enjoy it.

[lucidious]

Love...baby don't hurt meeeee no moreeeee lol the title automatically brings me to that song and night at the Roxbury movie

 

I believe...

"Love is giving someone the power to destroy you and trusting that they won't"

And it is a series of chemical reactions due to the release of adrenaline, dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin, and vasopressin

 

Here's a cool article on the science of the stages of falling in love:

[WithLove]

I'm actually stuck answering this. Kind of sad. When I think of love, the strongest I feel is for my children. I would kill or be killed to ensure their survival. There isn't a thing I wouldn't do for them. My love for them is unquestionable and unwavering. I don't think it's possible to feel this way about anyone else.

 

I was on a bluff overlooking the ocean at sunset. My girlfriend was at me at the time. She said something silly. She had her own language. I usually found it annoying. But this time when she said it I thought it was cute. It was just so her. I turned to look at her. I knew that was the moment I fell in love with her. We were at the nine month mark. After that she just didn't feel like a girlfriend. She felt like a close friend. Someone I wanted to be around and enjoy. Unfortunately it ended shortly after. That's how I came to be here. I was upset. I didn't cry though until a couple of evenings later. It was Thursday. We almost always saw each other Thursday evening. It hit me like a ton of bricks. The phone wasn't going to ring like it had every Thursday for months. I wouldn't hear her voice. I cried. I felt alone and empty. I sometimes think love is more simple than we make it to be. All I wanted was the phone to ring, hear her voice, and then go to her place, and simply be with her. No mystery.

 

I met my wife in the 80s. It was time for me to grow up. She was a good catch. I liked her, and found her attractive. I left her after I changed trades in the military. We were both still relatively young. She was in university still. We decided to end it when I left. It was very unlikely that after this course I would be posted back. When the plane was taxiing I looked out the window. I could see her on the edge of the tarmac waving good bye. I couldn't cry openly. I was a young man in uniform on a plane with other young men in uniform. My heart was breaking. Tears did manage to escape. And it love seems so simple when I look back on this. It was just that feeling of wanting to be with someone. Someone that became part of your world. The thought of never seeing her again was unbearable at that moment. I did get posted back. We married. We fell out of love. No all love lasts forever.

 

I first saw her a few years ago in a club. I fell in love with her instantly. People don't believe in love at first site. Next.

 

I was leaving the cafe yesterday. I heard my name being called. I turned. It was the closest friend in my life. We have known each other since teenagers. We have been through a lot together. We have witnessed each other's triumphs, and we have witnessed each other's spectacular falls. We make no real effort at keeping in touch. It's understood we can go our own ways, and our paths will always lead back to one another. We go months and years without contact. We quickly caught up. I met his girlfriend. We hugged and said I love you. We made vague plans to get together soon. Maybe we will, maybe we won't. Love is sometimes a bond forged by sharing mutual pains and victories.

 

Love is simply a feeling. Maybe we shouldn't analyze it. Feel it and enjoy it.

 

Sportster..... Thank you for sharing this. I'm sniffling at work.

[Hermes]

"Do approaches to romantic love vary across cultures?

 

The distinction between collectivist cultures and individualistic cultures is frequently made in cross-cultural studies. In collectivist cultures, found in many Asian countries, an individual's identity is tied to his or her social group. In individualistic countries, such as the United States and Canada, the individual's independent identity is prioritized. People from collectivist cultures expect love to grow as the marriage unfolds over time. There is less emphasis on romance and infatuation. Instead people emphasize practical concerns, such as income potential and compatibility with the extended family. In contrast, people from individualist countries emphasize the passionate side of love when looking for a spouse. They focus on feelings of excitement and physical attraction."

 

 

 

All that said it is probably easier to define what love ISN'T than what love IS.......

[Wiseman2]

Love...baby don't hurt meeeee no moreeeee lol the title automatically brings me to that song and night at the Roxbury movie

]

[Hermes]

 

 

Something to ponder.

 

The act of loving is what gives us fulfillment. Receiving love is nice—but it is not a necessity. Enjoy your pursuits, but refuse to believe that you can't be happy without that certain someone. We tend to be terrible judges of what will make us happy.—Nando Pelusi, Ph.D.

 

 

and

 

Immature love says, “I love you because I need you.”

 

Mature love says, “I need you because I love you.”

~ Erich Fromm

 

and

 

"Love is a word that is bandied around a lot and has many different meanings. Here are three of them:

 

Romantic love is marinated in fantasy. Excitement rules the day. You are walking on air. He can do no wrong. You are the luckiest woman on earth. Nothing will ever come between the two of you.

But, alas, infatuation does not stand the test of time. As it wanes, either a couple breaks up (“that was a great love affair”) or it develops into seasoned love.

 

Seasoned love is marinated in caring, respect, trust and empathy. Differences are respected. Conflicts are worked out. Individuality is respected. Love grows deeper. Love grows stronger.

And then there is addictive love.

 

Addictive love is marinated in desperation. You feel you cannot live without this person. You need him to feel complete. Though you no longer feel good about yourself like you did when you were “infatuated with him,” you, nevertheless, feel you can’t leave him.

“But I love him” has become your mantra. Despite rarely enjoying being with him, you love him. Despite being constantly criticized, you love him. Despite crying about insults you’ve received, you love him. Despite being afraid of his anger, you love him.

 

Clearly, addicted love does not listen to logic. It does not respect reason. It does not give credence to other people’s counsel. Despite your self-worth hitting a new low, you don’t leave the relationship. Just like a drug addict, you cannot give up your drug of choice."

 

From

 

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