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Urgently need advice pls!!


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Hello, if you've read my previous posts on here this week you'll know I was struggling with a break up. Anyways, I had a missed call from the ex!!! He text me ten mins later saying he thought I'd been ringing him off unknown but it was his mother, I rang him anyway and the conversation started ok then I made the worst mistake!!!! I asked if he was really ringing because he had someone else!! Aargh he wasn't happy with this and half an hour into the convo he came around as I explained I've been down & couldn't help but ask that (kicking myself now) anyway I jokingly said at the end of the call does he want to come for a ride in my new car when I get it in a couple of weeks (he's always had first ride in my new cars) and he asked if I wanted to meet tonight when he finishes work!!! I feel he might have said that out of duty??? I don't know. I was only half joking when I said go for a drive and I also said a couple of WEEKS not tonight. What do you guys think?

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Since he broke up with you, he didn't care enough about you to stay and work things out. Past behavior predicts future behavior. If you got back together, he'd probably dump you again. He wants a booty call tonight without the effort it takes to be in an exclusive relationship. Go no contact so you can have closure. There will be a man in your future who will never let you go, not even once, because he will be so crazy about you. Hold out for him.

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Hi Andrina thanks for reading. The thing is, he broke up because he felt we needed some time apart to work it out which I feel happens often. Difference is, I didn't give it any time, he kept giving in saying he'd give me another chance & I kept messing up by still not working through my anxiety issues & constantly contacting. I kind of can't help but feel lucky he even wants to give me the time of day to be honest? It wouldn't end up in sex because we made that mistake in the first few months and haven't done it since haha

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I didn't give it any time, he kept giving in saying he'd give me another chance & I kept messing up by still not working through my anxiety issues & constantly contacting. I kind of can't help but feel lucky he even wants to give me the time of day to be honest?

 

Or do you think he's got in touch as an excuse, knowing that you will take him back/reply to his calls/messages...?

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Confession time...We went through periods where he would block and unblock my number (yes I was a nightmare) I used to ring him on unknown if he blocked me and I wanted to speak to him so I kinda think if he has been getting unknown calls he would think it was me as I used to do it...I duno I kinda think that's legit. He only said to meet for a little bit once he finishes work (he's on a late shift) so honestly I don't think a booty call would be on his mind purely because we'd do as we have done in the past and meet somewhere neutral rather than back to his apartment

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I feel like you guys will think I'm making excuses but I guess when you're posting on a forum it's hard to get a full picture of everything? I guess I'm feeling now that I put him through the ringer & if he has started missing me and wants to meet for a chat is kind of be throwing it in his face after all I've done to him emotionally? I don't know if that makes sense

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On the flip side I feel you guys all do have a point. I've been going through the moving on process do I want to set myself back? It would be easier to continue NC. It's just what if I regret not taking this chance? knowing him I feel he'd be pretty hurt if he's reached out an olive branch and I ignore him

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Unfortunately the phone calls led to a convo and he may have interpreted it to mean you wanted to hookup.

 

After breaking up it's best to go no contact and block and delete the ex, for this reason.

I jokingly said at the end of the call does he want to come for a ride in my new car when I get it in a couple of weeks and he asked if I wanted to meet tonight when he finishes work!!
...same guy?
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Hi guys, thanks for your comments. I understand why you all think that, he knows he won't get that from me now, he did initially cause it was still raw but I told him months ago I'd not consider sleeping with him unless it was in a relationship. Does nobody think this is a good idea then? Haha

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Sadly it sounds like you are connecting to him looking for love, attention, reconciliation or a relationship rather than the fwb you always had with him but he continues to only suggest hookups.

 

It's a good idea if you want hookups or to reactivate your fwb situation.

Hi guys, thanks for your comments. I understand why you all think that, he knows he won't get that from me now, he did initially cause it was still raw but I told him months ago I'd not consider sleeping with him unless it was in a relationship. Does nobody think this is a good idea then? Haha
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Hi wiseman he didn't suggest meeting up to do anything sexual he suggested we do something that we used to do in our relationship together, I don't really want to say what that is for fear someone may take offence and report me but it's not sexual at all haha

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As long as you want to hang out with an ex to get high, maybe lead into sex, whatever it's up to you and what you want out of this.

he didn't suggest meeting up to do anything sexual he suggested we do something that we used to do in our relationship together
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