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Should i keep talking to him?


hilary

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So at the start of june i met this guy while i was out. We hit it off really well but the sad thing was that he lives in another state. Since then, he has been really eager to move to my city and has even applied for jobs here. Lately however, i asked him if he was still planning on moving here and he seemed quite hesitant and said "I'm not sure". He was committed to moving here and i would question him about it and it seemed like nothing was going to stop him. but now i think he's having second thoughts about it.

 

We have spoken to each other literally everyday since we met which is about 3.5 months ago. we text everyday and talk on the phone for hours.

He said he wants me to visit him in november and would be stoked if i did. The thing is, i don't want to pay to fly to his city and hang out with him and bond more and then potentially never see him again if he chooses to stay in his hometown..? this whole time we have been 'talking' and especially when he would drunk call/message me he would tell me he would date me if we lived in the same place. but the last few weeks we have spoken he has started to say he doesn't want a relationship after his ex screwed him over.

 

My question now is....what does he want from me? what would be the point in me flying to see him if we're just friends and may be don't see each other again? it would be different if i knew for sure that he was moving here, but his uncertainty is making me wonder if i should keep talking to him let alone FLY to see him.

 

should i just call it quits now?i reaaaaaaally like this guy but i just don't want to set myself up for failure

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Then I suggest you back off him.. now.

 

Sounds like this was like a 'high' for him.. for a while and that is starting to die off. Now, it sounds like 'reality' is setting in and he's having second thought.

 

Red flag, to have him mention the negatives of an ex. Shows he's not over that experience... not good.

 

Why continue something that really has no potential. No positive outcome.

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I did the LDR once for a couple years. Both people have to be on the same page. 3 months and he wants to move? That's a bit much unless he always wanted to. It's one thing to talk on the phone but unless you guys are seeing each other now and again then it's really hard. If he's saying he doesn't want a relationship. Then you have to accept that. Good luck

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he lived here for 2 years when he was younger so was visiting a friend for his birthday. he stayed for a week and said that after he went back home, he was set on moving here as he hated his hometown and needed a change.

 

i understand if he doesn't want a relationship, i just don't get why he talks to me so much then?

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