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guy i met online is persistently texting me..wont take the hint


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Right, so i got out of a relationship a few months ago. I was dumped because he couldn't commit. It's taking me a while to get myself together as im still in love with him and his wonderful family, they are also upset too and he had a few younger nephews who i adore so its been really tough but im getting there however, i stupidly went online dating before taking it off completely a few days later(i realised i needed time to heal) and i cant see myself dating at all for a good while...


There's a guy i spoke to on there who seems ok but is just far too pushy. He wants me to come down to see him(as he has a pet dog so can't find anyone to look after it) and he lives about 30 miles away. I dont have a car so i'd have to take a bus or train and i am worried about my personal safety as i dont know his city well at all..


Anyway, i already told him i'm needing time and he keeps coming back nagging me about things. I told him that the distance is a problem as i dont have a car and i also work A LOT..so i don't have time to squeeze in time for him, he said it's ok, we'll manage..but he's not actually having to do the travelling, is he? He wants me to come down to see him basically..


After a recent death in my family, he kept repeatedly texting me asking if i was ok and then told me the other night he was worried i was going to go crazy and that he still wants to meet soon. He texted me again this morning saying that he hopes i come down soon as he is off(again, i have to go down to see him)..he wants me to stay at his house for a few days.


Personally, i think he's a bit narcissistic, selfish and really, not that understanding that i want space but he wont take the hint. When i had a slight fall out with him a few weeks ago, he said that i need to get over myself and stop acting like the victim. I have had a lot to deal with in the last few years so to say that, when he doesn't know me, was pretty bad..


I tried to give him a chance but he honestly grates on me, i dont know how to say that i dont want to meet him full stop because he is so persistant(worryingly so)..


I have a horrible habit of dating control freaks and he comes across as possessing a number of these traits and he looks a bit...mean, psycho kind of eyes going on..for a while i was getting persistant photos of himself coming through, him topless, his hair, his eyes, his face, him lying in bed...


This sounds so horrible to say this but i can read people really well and get feelings off them, like a strong intuition and i have really never been wrong..and the alarm bells are definitely going off with him..


so...how do i go about this? I've taken him off facebook before, blocked him etc but he still keeps texting constantly, phoning loads, leaving voicemails..


he then followed me on twitter. I dont want to change my number, i think if push comes to shove i can get a text blocker app put on it..


Any advice would be wonderful!

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You could try telling him you've contacted the police. I had to report an ex for real for harassment, but after that if I did have a persistent guy I would just send a convincing message saying that I'd spoken to the police, they'd advised me to send this one message and that from this point on any further contact could get him issued with a harassment notice and arrested.

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shelly shut up honestly...i like to give people a chance just in case...


Well you're rude, no need for that!


Seriously though, you can apparently read people well but you've let this guy in even though he's done and said these weird and possesive things? Stop that.


As everyone has said, block and delete him from everything. If you are on Android you can get call and text blockers for free, if you pay a small sum then they will delete any voicemails or texts from the specified numbers automatically though these are paid features.

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"If you can read people really well why didn't you block him straight away"


That comment is rude. Yes i can. He hasn't been "let in", he added me on facebook before i had really spoken to him a lot and i havent met him, nor have i been returning calls or texts. He has been insanely persistent, which i'm not overly used to but he has now been blocked, found an app for Android, thanks for advice folks!

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