Do rebounds last if they started dating someone two weeks later?

[Daisygood]

Do rebounds last if they cheated and are dating someone ELSE, new... three weeks later? do they come running back?

 

My ex and i started dating a month after her dad passed. we were together for a year and i never left her side. We had this honestly deepest connection, we were automatically in love, we went through so much, I never left her side, we fought a lot definitely, but we loved harder. We were hot and heavy through summer to beginning of fall and then once the summer fun and distractions ended of her being with me, she started to get depressed and everything with her father hit her, I tried to stay by her side but she pushed me away every chance she had, then regretted t each time. her and i broke because she lost her mind, hurt me in every possible way you could think, we would make up and she would do it again on this distructive path she was on. And i mean I can only imagine, her father passed away and just was a mess, I had to watch her go through everything but i never stopped loving her no matter what. She would say " I love you so much and I'm so scared to lose you so instead I just push away and become defensive" then finally cheated on me, and then slept around for a bit. She started dating this guy for about a month, but it didn't last and came running back after 3 months, but during that time she would still attack me and contact me for random things. I figured she needed time to figure herself out and work on herself. so after 3/4 months of her attacking me and going through life and ups and downs, we started talking civil, and i took her back, she still blamed me for everything, but she said no distractions worked and she realized she loved me more than anything, she said she'll always love me and I'll always be the one, I'm like a drug she can't get enough of, she's going to marry me one day, I'm her soulmate. We started working on our relationship and then we started to fall again and picked up our relationship where it left off. Would come back and then say never mind, then come back again after I said I'm not playing games, then Got back on hot and heavy. She told me everything i needed to hear, and i saw it in her eyes, felt in her touch, things that reminded me of the beginning of our relationship. Told me she wanted to marry me, love me, etc.. everything you could think of. I ended up going away on our one year anniversary because it was already pre booked. SHE ended up sleeping WIRH someone else on our one year night (we weren't "official" but still), and then told me about it drunk. She came back apologizing saying i deserve better and she doesnt know why shes doing what shes doing, but she wants me so bad and loves me so much and cant understand why she is **** up so bad. She said she cant be in a long distance relationship right now and cant handle it, she needs me closer (her new gf lives right by her) then said she needs to work on herself, I'm her soulmate bt she can't be withh me, she doesn't want to be in a serious relationship, she doesn't forgive me for the things I did (trust me I didn't do much of anything) She said she loves me and wants me so bad, "imagine loving me as much as you do and knowing youre the reason it wont work" she kept saying she needs to be alone before she can be with me in a healthy way because she is not healthy right now.

 

So, i say i dont want you anymore, You messed up for the last time. She tells me she slept around and did it because its superficial bt she doesn't feel anything when she does it... I ripped her a new tushy.. For about 2 days straight just repeating how awful she was and I never did anything bad to

You. Well.. She tells me Abot a week later she's going on dates and dating but none of them look like me, I'm so perfect, bla blah.. But there's one person that looks like me. She ends up going on the date and then She then ends up being sarcastic and then starts saying I don't love you anymore, I fell out of love, you're pathetic, leave me alone, following week she calls me crying becusee her mom is sick while I'm away having a good time.. Obviously I answer and say do you need me.... She stops answering, then drunk me says I won't be there at ur convince because life is going bad... She ends up blocking me and saying I'm an ass... Next weekend goes by... Long story short, her new person that she was "going on a date with" came up to me in a club and said im her new gf, and i said oh... well she has been contacting me for the past two weeks (they were dating for about two weeks and are now official) so i tell her, yes shes been contacting, and has been calling my friends, saying how much she loves me and wants to marry me, just needs to be with me but cant understand why she cant figure it out and keeps hurting me, she needs to get good with herself first (all true events that occurred). Her new gf then says yeah we talk about u all the time, she tells me ur crazy and blah blah... So, i tell her new gf that and she asks me to MAKE OUT WITH HER TO SEND IT TO her through a video. so i said yes just bexuse I was so like in shock of what has occurred, and we did. I wanted to hurt her for how bad she hurt me, later at the end of the night, her new gf said she wanted to have sex with me I said no and made a sly joke, she says I can't cheat I have cheated in every other relationship..... Lol. So this is how their relationship started off. All occurred end of June.

 

So now let's see... A month goes by and I've been blocked. I end up meeting someone else in Florida and posting them on snapchat/Instagram. And I recieve two texts .. Saying yo, and a phone call. I did not Answer. I let it be and did the "no contact thing". Another month goes by and her fathers 1 year and 6 month is coming up. So I text her a few days prior (so I don't distract her mind where it should be) and say I hope everything is okay, and ur family is well and good including your mom. I get a phone call hours later at 1130 at night with her saying "why are you texting me, why are you contacting me, you don't care about my happiness you made out with my girlfriend, how could you do that (like she was that mad at ME for doing that, meanwhile she's still dating the person that initiated it) and yours friends verbally attacked me, you shouldn't be contacting me, you don't need to check up me, throw out my dads card, we moved on there's no point, you don't know how to be civil, ur a c***, Idc that my new gf did that I decided to forgive her for it and move on" this went on for about 2 hours of me hanging up and then her calling back, then me calling back, her saying "if you don't care and you're happy for me why are you picking up my phone calls, there's no point or reason for us talking, (I asked why she texted me the month prior) and she goes, Bc I was blackout drunk and was thinking about you" so I hang up, and text her saying "idk why I bothered you don't deserve a text after what you did" she calls me and says you weren't perfect either, you chose to stay with me during that time, and I ws like yes that was my choice because I loved you... then turns around and says "what's wrong (in a calm voice) talk to me, you have my number if u need to speak" then turns around and says "well there's no point to be civil, I don't need you caring about Me". So she was all defensive hot and cold.... All over the place

 

Now since then it's been Abot 3 weeks and hasn't contacted me back since that conversation. All my friends say it's a rebound and won't last, she needs voids and attention and because this new person is right there, it's easier. But if you had a connection the way we did how do you just forget it? And move on? She has come back every other time when those "distractions don't work" I want to ask but idk

 

they are still together. So advice? do you think they will last, do you think this is a major rebound?...

[boltnrun]

I can't predict whether or not THEY will last, but I CAN tell you that you and her shouldn't.

 

This relationship is super unhealthy. People in love don't lie, cheat, film themselves cheating to try to hurt one another, call one another abusive names, etc.

[SkellyWoozle]

Why do you care anyway? She's a cheater and someone who can't be trusted. Would you really want her back or are you just willing for things not go work out? The world works in mysterious ways. Get on with your life - what she gets up to is none of your business. Find someone who loves and cares for you without question and has respect for both you and herself. Good luck X

[Daisygood]

I have been hearing "the world works in mysterious ways" non stop lately! I guess I just don't understand why this is happening. It's like I'm stuck in this awful daZe of confusion. They always say once you move on they come back.. I don't think I want her back but I want to understand how this is working with someone else. You can't go from losing a parent, to being so in love, to then sweeping both under the rug and moving on to this "fabulous relationship". It's just an awful feeling!

[Daisygood]

I agree. We were extremely unhealthy but it's like we wnt trough so much, I don't know why I still love her. Their relationship started off awfully, so why is she with someone that cheated on her already? It doesn't make sense

[boltnrun]

I agree. We were extremely unhealthy but it's like we wnt trough so much, I don't know why I still love her. Their relationship started off awfully, so why is she with someone that cheated on her already? It doesn't make sense

 

Why would you think either of you would be in healthy relationships when you weren't healthy together?

 

I'd focus less on what she's doing and more on why you believe you "love" someone like her. Do you think love means drama?

[Daisygood]

No I don't believe love means drama, but I do believe when you love someone unconditionally you take their faults with their positives, and she had a lot of faults... But I didn't care. She was my first everytging and I stuck by her side because of the pain regarding her father... I like to think I'm a good person, and a healthy one at that.

[MissCanuck]

You have an unhealthy view of unconditional love. It doesn't mean you should allow someone to mistreat you and disrespect you. That is what you have been tolerating. And that isn't love - it's co-dependency.

 

Your relationship with her is very toxic. She doesn't love you. Let her go so you can find someone who actually values you. She doesn't.

[Matt3939]

I made it 2/3 thru you aren't a doormat. Find someone who deserves you. Good luck