Relationship issues. Please help.

[Breeaful]

I don't like who I am when I'm with Anthony.

I'm mean, and I treat him the same way my first boyfriend treated me.

And it's like I'm forcing myself to act differently but it's a struggle.

So I feel like he deserves better than me, but we're so intertwined. We're married by law and he's dependent upon me to help him. It's not like I can just become selfish and say "oh well you're on your own." I care a great deal about him.

But there's no passion. I don't feel a desire to kiss him, scratch his back, hold him in my arms.

I tend to push him away in annoyance. And he always comes back. He's overly nice and does everything for me and randomly gets me flowers, and supports me, and listens to me, and is faithful to me.

So this is where I say the problem is me.

I've spoken to him about the passion thing and about acting a little more protective, or aggressive. But it's not in his nature.

I'm so unaroused during sex. And we don't even have any. I think I'm too young for this but I know I've found a good boyfriend and I feel like I don't deserve him but at the same time I want something more.

I have these fears that in 10 years from now, we'll have had a child, and I'm just a nightmare. Treating him like , him taking care of the baby more than me just because he won't say no if I ask him to.

I know so many women who are in ty relationships, who've been abused and keep going back, so I have no right to complain. So what the is wrong with me? Why can't I just be content? Why do I always treat him like garbage?

I got really depressed the other day, couldn't get out of bed. Didn't want to see or talk to anyone. Couldn't eat.

I need help. And I know my issues are selfish and minute, but I'm worried about my mental health and wellbeing.

[nao]

You should probably ask for professional support, there you might get more adequate help in figuring out why are you feeling this way... The only way I see resolving this by finding the root of your problems, which is probably not Anthony... Good luck!

[Wiseman2]

How old are you both? how long have you been married? What do you mean "he's dependent upon me to help him". Do you support him financially?

 

Do you resent him or feel he acts like a doormat? Are you attracted to him? It sounds like you are depressed and very angry in general and shouls see a doctor and therapist to find out why. No guy is going to fix that.

We're married by law and I'm so unaroused during sex. I think I'm too young for this. Why do I always treat him like garbage?

[bohoqueeen]

Based on how you describe him, you're lucky to have a man like that! Don't think that you don't deserve him or he deserves better... blahh blaaahh blaaaaahh!

After all, we always tend to "Accept the love we think we deserve" right? Stop overthinking about your situation Stay cool and chill about everything. Keep it calm, classy and collected!

Honestly, the root cause of the problem is within you. Change your thoughts with a positive vibe cos' it will change your actions & treatment towards him. Just think positively and abundantly There is so much more to life than misery and pain! Trust me I have been through all that bull. I tried to escape my fears, pain and insecurities but nothing worked. You have to start with yourself! Love yourself before you love someone else or why not do both? Learn to love yourself and your husband. Perhaps you need self-actualization? It's up to you.

 

Keep in mind that the world doesn't revolve around each one of us Live life selflessly and unconventionally!

Know your weaknesses and strengths. Accept and love yourself. Be the best version of yourself while seeing the best within your partner. Help each other grow!

You're not the center of the world, we are just a part of it. So explore and discover so much more! Live life to your fullest potential

 

Just like this forum: You are not alone.

 

Please search for "Prince Ea" in YouTube. Look up for his video "Love yourself before you love someone else" (can't paste URL here. i dunno why) It will inspire you to start today!

[willdation]

"I've spoken to him about the passion thing and about acting a little more protective, or aggressive. But it's not in his nature."

 

Ok I think I know what the issue is and it is not you. I would say that you most likely have more of a feminine type of personality. There is something called "polarity" in relationships where the attraction comes when one person is more masculine (direct, confident, certain, goes after goals and ambitions, doesn't let anyone push him around) whereases the other person is feminine (more about opening up and building relationships and receiving love) - this doesnt have to be gender based btw..

 

So basically, it could be that your boyfriend doesn't act as much as a man as you would like and does not give you that masculine presence you desire.

 

Someone who is really feminine by nature will not want to be with someone who is not masculine - can be easily pushed around, is a people pleaser, weak and needy, insecure, changes mind all the time, not protective...and on and on.... (this is actually one of the main reasons guys get friend zoned)

 

But don't worry, this can easily be learned...Most guys these days are shown via media etc. that they need to be more feminine and submissive...Maybe have him check out Corey Wayne videos....Even Tony Robbins (advisor for all these famous people) talks about this..

 

here is video more about this -

 

I think this is really true and probably the reason for this... so nothing wrong with you