Suddenly left saying no feelings. Cant do anything right now

[eventhorizon]

Been together for about a year, met as students. both first GF and BF. Everything seemed so great, she and I were both respectful and supportive of each other.

Minor fights were resolved with talks everytime, and never had any huge fights. She was always in a bit of an emotional rollercoaster, just

loving and stopping, their magnitudes always getting stronger.

it started as interest, then like, then friend, disinterest, love and now 'no feelings'. Ive always brought the best of myself, and she admits i have.

I drove every date to her house (lives away about 40min by car) to pick her up and drop her off and other dedication to really hold onto the relationship.

it was about a month ago where she sat down with me and out of the blue told me she doesnt know if im a great friend or a boyfriend anymore and needed

time to think. But after like 2 days she came back saying she'd probably break if im not there and realised how important i was. I know for a fact that she never

lied about anything she told me, but just a couple days back, she came to me very apologetically and told me she has no feelings for me anymore and doesnt see us

in the future anymore. but asked me to stay close to her as a friend. it wasnt like "we can still be friends" i quote it was more of "i know this is really cruel and selfish

thing to ask but can we still stay as great friends?" (we were good friends before the relationship) but then blocked me on social media saying we both need time and

space even is she knows "its being so cruel" to me. I feel like this is just one of her emotional downfalls from the stress at uni and work, and she might regret the decision.

We have not been in contact for about 3 days and im finding it hard to cope she left me so unexpectedly and ive lost my first love when i still have so much feelings left.

I feel as if this stage is just one of the relationship lull or rut that others talk about, due to repeated schedules in relationships, because we always met up at same time,

same restaurant and same routine every date.

 

will she regret her decision? will she come back? is she as painful as i am feeling right now such that i cant carry on with my daily activities at the thought of her?

[MissCanuck]

This isn't a lull or rut. You haven't been together long enough for that to have happened.

 

I think she just isn't as into you as she thought. She probably wants to be because she does like and respect you, but she knows deep-down she doesn't feel the same way. If it's always been an emotional roller coaster, why are you hoping she comes back? For more of the same?

 

The truth is that while she is probably sad that she hurt you, she isn't feeling the same grief you are right now. By the time dumpers pull the plug, they've generally already done their grieving and further along the process of moving on. She might regret it, but none of us here can begin to place bets on it. We don't know what's going on inside her mind, whether someone else caught her eye, what her true feeling are. It's actually a good thing she's blocked you, because seeing any reminders of her at this point will be too painful.

 

I would consider it done and behave accordingly. Don't try to stay "great friends" with her. It will only hurt you, because you still have feelings. Think about how much it will suck to be in the Friend Zone and later she tells you about some new guy she's met. Which should be fine, because you're just friends, right? Wrong. Don't do that to yourself.

[Brutal555]

Don't bother thinking what's going on in her mind right now or what's on her mind, that's an endless road for you. Don't even think about being friends right now, you need to heal yourself, you can't heal yourself If she's around "being your friend" because you'll want to jump her and kiss her. Don't pursue her, call her or text her.

[Wiseman2]

Yes it sounds like she is making decisions about the relationship with a bunch of drunk blindfolded girlfriends playing darts: Break up with him, no tell him you are friends, no tell him you still love him but as a friend, wait no tell him you don't love him, no tell him you don't want to hurt him so you need to breakup, no just block him, yeah them suddenly unblock him.

She was always in a bit of an emotional rollercoaster

 

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