ShadedCrow Posted September 7, 2016 Share Posted September 7, 2016 My girlfriend is snooping through my phone when I'm not in the room, this occurrence has happened that I know of 7 times, I know of these because she has confronted me about it when she had came across things that happened well beyond being in a relationship with her. Other times she'd question me about the girls who would like or comment on my post. She'd always ask what I was doing when I was on my phone, as if merely just being on my phone scrolling Facebook to see what my friends were up to she'd become jealous. I've never really put a lock on my phone because I never really needed one, I don't have anything to hide and I honestly truly have no interest in pursuing someone while currently involved in a relationship. Well, I never really was the jealous type, but since her things just get to me that I would of never thought of before, I guess I just wanted to know why she would feel like she does. And I would notice her liking another guy's picture after he had gone on to like a considerable number of pictures of hers, all except the ones with me in them. I just had a sense that this was strange and it never settled right with me. I had asked her if there was anything there, but of course she denied anything and presumed they were just friend's and nothing more, I left it alone but the suspicious feeling was still there. I continued to ask after the activity continued, and one day noticing after picking her up from the airport that there was another guy as her background screen, she said it was a band from warped tour, it was halfway true, this guy was a musician, she'd listen to his songs, and I'm not sure if I was just blind from being in love that I hadn't put 2 and 2 together then but everything was practically starring me in the face, even if I would have pieced it together I would have denied it because I have a serious problem of given everyone the benefit of the doubt. I had reached the point and pulled myself together to just go right out and ask the guy, and he had told me that she's been flirty and had said that she's been saying she was single. Now, technically she didn't cheat on me right? Or am I trying to convince myself, I was hurt at that point and seriously wanted to end it... so why didn't I?... Maybe it was that when she was confronted with the screenshots of the conversation she didn't deny it, and promised to never do it again, and she seemed really sincere, I don't know it could have been the tears of a pretty girl... I haven't felt the relationship being as full since then... I can't rationalize why I still continue... I just don't know what to do, or how to go about it anymore, I feel I've tried everything I'm capable of... And it sucks because she still snoops through my phone, and realizes that what she is doing isn't right but still does it and says she has no idea why she does things like this, that she just does it without thinking and says that she's a bad person that I deserve someone better and after the tears subside and I say everything's ok that she says "please don't leave me"... After what seemingly seems to be her trying to get me to leave her by saying she doesn't deserve me and I should be with someone better... I feel as though this is all driving me crazy... What do I do? Is there a way to fix any of this? Because if there is, as crazy as it sounds I'd rather find a way to fix it than to tuck n roll out of the relationship... Because despite how much she puts herself down she still is a pretty amazing individual Link to comment
gebaird Posted September 7, 2016 Share Posted September 7, 2016 Sounds to me like she's worried about you cheating because she's a cheater herself, or at least walking that fine line. I'd put a pass code on your phone and see how she reacts. My guess is she'll be upset. But the girl has PROBLEMS. Leaving your phone unprotected just enables her bad behavior. I don't know if you can fix this. Maybe if she's willing to get some professional help? If I we're you I'd take a really close look at your reasons for wanting her around. It might make sense to your heart, but does it make sense to your head? Feels to me like you are more in love with the idea of what could be than what actually is. Link to comment
moodindigo91 Posted September 7, 2016 Share Posted September 7, 2016 Okay, so here is the thing. I think everyone "snoops" in some way. Social media and technology make it so easy. Every SO has gone on FB and saw some dude or chick like a photo of their SO and they creep on dude/chick's page for a minute and then it's done. They don't do it again, they don't bring it up to their SO, and they certainly don't become jealous about it. Anyone whose doing it constantly to you, and trying to keep tabs on you, in my experience, is someone who is lying themselves. This is your current situation. She was snooping on you, terrified thinking that you were out and about doing the same thing as her. You are not happy, you cannot justify this in your mind, and she has openly paraded herself as SINGLE to another man. Why would you even bother continuing on with this relationship? If she wants to be single, grant her this wish because you are way better off without her. Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted September 7, 2016 Share Posted September 7, 2016 This has a lot to do with it. How long have you been dating? I don't know it could have been the tears of a pretty girl... Link to comment
Matt3939 Posted September 7, 2016 Share Posted September 7, 2016 I had somone that would go thru everything of mine. I just left it out phone computer ect. Always checking. Anyway the very few times I asked for her phone. To setup apps on her phone id get the 3rd degree. Well it finally came to be she was cheating. Good luck Link to comment
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