Am I wrong? Please chime in.

[Justjson]

So I thought I'd ask all of you a question so I can get honest opinions from people that have no connection to the situation--it's about a conflict based on a choice I made. I will keep it as brief as possible. I live with my mother, father and sister. I went on vacation for a week with my girlfriend who I've been with for a few years. While away we discussed how nice it would be to spend all day on Labor Day together at her house, the day after we get back.

When we got back the day before Labor Day, I found out that my niece's mother had died. This is the daughter of my brother Scott, who died ten years ago. So out of respect for my dead brother, my mother decided to have a reception for my niece at our house on Labor Day, and to have it catered. Our family isn't that close to my niece Jessica, but again, out of respect for my brother, wanted to do something, since she now has no parents. My whole family attended--my nephew, godmother, sister, the niece of course, her step father, and my step father's mother and a couple others.

This was all last minute but my family expected me to attend because it was my brothers daughter who now lost her mother and they felt like my brother would have wanted us to do this and be there. Everyone stayed until Jessica (my niece) left, and so did I, as they expected me to.

The problem is, my girlfriend got very hurt, upset and mad that I, as she put it, chose my family over seeing her that day which was wrong because we had plans to hang out and she doesn't get many holidays off.

 

I told her it was a last minute family obligation and id feel like a huge jerk and weirdo by not attending and staying, especially since I live there and plus they all expected me to. So there was a ton of pressure for me to stay and I'd never hear the end of it if I didn't.

My girlfriend says it doesn't matter, I ruined her Labor Day and could have just walked out or not attended at all, and it doesn't matter what my family thinks about me. I told her it matters a lot, especially since I live there. So she said what SHE feels matters too and I hurt her by not seeing her on Labor Day and she's wants to break up with me now because she says if she was important enough I would have "picked her."

 

In your honest opinion, did I do the wrong thing? I felt like I had no choice anyway, given the circumstances. She doesn't agree and says I should have seen her like we planned.

[Capricorn3]

Your girlfriend is completely out of line, immature and unreasonable. You did nothing wrong here at all. She needs to grow up.

[j.man]

Your girlfriend is a pretty disgusting woman.

[Seraphim]

She needs to grow the hell up. Someone DIED for god's sake and you already spent a week with her . Wow, what a callous callous spoiled woman.

[shellyf62]

I think she is out of line as well. These sorts of things cant be planned for, and it was lovely of your Mother to have organised this for your niece.

 

Why wasnt your gf invited to the reception if you two have been dating for a few years?

[thejigsup]

Whoa. You need to tell your gf to back the hell up. Someone in your family DIED! Your niece now has no parents. Your gf sounds like an entitled (b)itch. You can do better.

[Beatlelover]

If your gf was respectful she would totally understand your family obligation. Did you ask her if she would come with you?

[Lisii]

Wow... just wow, she sounds very selfish and immature. You are better off without her.

[charity]

Is there more to this story? I mean the way you describe how your girlfriend behaved it is, as many have said. quite disgusting, spoiled selfish etc....is this out of the blue?. I would imagine that someone who behaves can't have hidden this side of herself all along right?

[SkellyWoozle]

Hmmm, I would say she was out of order and needs to grow up and/or be more sympathetic to the cause. But that's just me. You also don't say how old you both are and/or if there's an age gap. Either way, she wasn't very understanding about the whole situation. That said, I don't think she deserves the abuse from some of the other posters!