Stephenchadd Posted August 30, 2016 Share Posted August 30, 2016 I moved out the house I shared with my ex in April, and after I moved out when went on a date (well not a date as such) to the theatre. I booked a restaurant, but I'm the end the show ended late so we decided or she decided she would rather grab something quick to eat on the way home, which we did. She dropped me off home and that was that apart from a kiss on her cheek. After that she said she missed me and was texting like she used to, and for about a week I thought she wanted to try again. Unfortunately she said this was down to her missing me being there than actually wanting to try again, confusing from my point of view. Anyway we met up once again for a meal and talked for a few hours, and she told me that that she didn't it was right to try again. So we left it there. Since then I've met up with her and her daughter (my step daughter) a few times, the last being a month ago. And it was very friendly. And I was ok with this arrangement. I didn't force my emotions on her, even though I would have loved her back. Then today I received an email from her explaining that she had met someone, but it was early days and that he's a nice guy. She wants to remain friends and still talk and meet up occasionally either on her own or with her daughter too. Which again I'm ok with. She mentioned in the email that she was angry about why it ended because everything was ok apart from one thing. Let me tell you why we split. Our sex life had become non existent, and she couldn't take it anymore. Now let me explain it from my point of view. For whatever reason I made excuses not to have sex, not because I didn't find her attractive, just something in me was stopping me. So I went to see a counsellor for the last few months, in fact I have been since Jan this year. And my issues stem from my childhood, and it opened up why I was so like I was, as it happens in other relationships. Needless to say I would have no problem having sex with my ex, purely because I've addressed all my issues. But it may be too late. But I would have her back tomorrow if I could. So what I want to know is, has she jumped into a new relationship too soon, and have there been occasions when couples have got back together when what has happened in my situation? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wiseman2 Posted August 30, 2016 Share Posted August 30, 2016 Unfortunately she met someone, asked you to move out, is still angry about refusing to have sex with her, so being in the friendzone and chatting, meeting up with her and her daughter,etc. probably won't repair this.I moved out the house I shared with my ex in April. I received an email from her explaining that she had met someone.She mentioned in the email that she was angry about why itOur sex life had become non existent, and she couldn't take it anymore. I made excuses not to have sex. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matt3939 Posted August 30, 2016 Share Posted August 30, 2016 She's in a new relationship it has to run its course. It's good that you got help with your issue. Once you feel ready you should try to meet somone new. With your question about getting back together? It happens all the time but i wouldnt count on it. Good luck Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stephenchadd Posted August 30, 2016 Author Share Posted August 30, 2016 It wasn't really a case of me refusing, my mind wasn't in the right place at the time. But I get why she is angry. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wiseman2 Posted August 30, 2016 Share Posted August 30, 2016 What happened that you 'couldn't' have sex with her? Are you gay? bi? asexual? impotent? on alcohol/drugs? Was this a problem before her? Or in the beginning? Because why would anyone even enter an asexual relationship, move in together, etc. to be "friends" or "roommates"?It wasn't really a case of me refusing, my mind wasn't in the right place at the time. But I get why she is angry. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stephenchadd Posted August 30, 2016 Author Share Posted August 30, 2016 To answer each point,not gay, bi sexual or impotent. Not on drugs or alcohol. Like I said earlier I me through counselling to see what it was that made me be like I was. And it stemed from childhood, where after moving in with someone i closed up and went into self destruct if that makes sense. We were having sex when we moved in but it steadily got less, and the. It got to point where I got stressed by the thought as I didn't think I could perform, even though I so wanted too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wiseman2 Posted August 30, 2016 Share Posted August 30, 2016 That makes sense, otherwise she would not have entered a romantic relationship or moved in unless she also wanted friends or roommates or some other asexual arrangement. However back to the original question. it sounds like she moved on to someone and years of rejection took their toll, sorry. However whatever treatment you received will hopefully allow you to maintain relationship in the future rather than losing interest/dreading sex after a while.We were having sex when we moved in but it steadily got less, and the. It got to point where I got stressed by the thought as I didn't think I could perform, even though I so wanted too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stephenchadd Posted August 30, 2016 Author Share Posted August 30, 2016 I agree she's moved on, and if I was her I would have done the same thing. As to wether we ever get back I suppose no one knows, I'm not going to beat myself up about trying too. But what I've learnt in the past few months is you don't know what's around the corner. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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