Should I leave or stay?

[jnikki]

I am here seeking for advice because I don't know what to do anymore. I've been with my girlfriend for about 3 years now, we lived in different states so I moved just to be with her. Now her past is very difficult for me to deal with because she went around a lot, she stayed at strip clubs and went around having sex with whichever girl she could find. That past still bothers me but it's hard to get over it when she is friends with strippers she has had sex with. We take vacations with one specific girl who is a stripper and she's had sex with and I just don't say anything to try to avoid conflict. We take group vacations so I try to not pay attention to that. But that girl has always been an issue because she's an attention seeker, her and my gifriend haven't done anything since we started dating but just her presence bothers me so much ! Am I wrong? So recently we went on a vacation together when we came back I made the mistake of going on my gifriends Facebook just to find out she was talking to her best friend and I saw a message which said "I'm going to have sex with her whenever I have the chance" and by her she was talking about that girl who has always bothered me and when I confronted her all she said was "I was joking I just say things but I wasn't serious I would never" but now I don't know what to do I just don't trust her.

We have this music festival we always go to and of course that girl goes and of course after this incident I told her we couldn't go with her because I would feel uncomfortable. Want to know her response? She said "well we just won't go because that would be rude for us to just not go with her without saying why" it irritates me to know that we can't go somewhere because she can't say no to her. I'm going crazy

[ControlDenied]

Man up! Women respect that.

[jnikki]

How? What exactly should I do? Lesbian relationships are so difficult it's bad

[Capricorn3]

How? What exactly should I do? Lesbian relationships are so difficult it's bad

 

I'll move this to the more appropriate Gay, Lesbian, Bi and Transsexual forum so that members don't get confused.

[jnikki]

Yes please I'm new to this I realized I posted on the wrong one and didn't know how to move it

[Iggy5129]

She is disrespecting your relationship. There's no excuse for this I don't care if she's a lesbian. There is no way in hell I would allow my BF to bring a woman he slept with on vacation with us. I barely even talk about past relationships with my BF because it does nothing good for the relationship.

 

Sounds like maybe she's having a hard time giving up her old ways? She clearly has no idea of appropriate boundaries for someone in a relationship. I would talk to he about it but I'm not sure she would really understand.

[jnikki]

That's exactly what I tell her and her answer is always. "We're good friends now"

[Wiseman2]

It sounds like this friend hangs around too much, like a fifth wheel. Talk to your partner about exes (even hookups) and boundaries.

[Jibralta]

Am I wrong?

 

It's not a question of wrong or right. It's a question of whether your partner respects your feelings, which she doesn't. Some people might be ok with an ex-lover hanging around. That's fine for them. It doesn't mean that it has to be fine for you (it wouldn't be fine for me, either). If this is something that bothers you, you need to be prepared to draw the line, even if it means ending the relationship. Stand up for yourself.