I don't know if he is being honest or just a good player

[sexloveme]

Okay so I met this guy. We are actually neighbours. When we met we just got talking as friends. I learnt he had a girlfriend and all. He was actually the first to approach me. He got talking and flirting for about 2 months. He is 30 BTW. I'm in my early 20''s. Okay. So after 2 months due to my fault we drifted apart a bit. But after a month we got toget her again. Still just as friends . Talking and all. But he told me he liked me. He very straightforward . All this while he had not even touched me. No kiss nothing. Just hugs.

One day I kinda dared him to kiss me. And he did and since then we have been making out. And he still tells me he really likes me. We nearly had sex too. Now the question is do I have a future with him? Should I still go on with him? And can he be lying to me? He talks to me every day. Text me from the time he wakes up till work and back and even try to close early to take me out. I don't want to sleep with him and that would be the end. I'm confused. Help please

[Wolfshook]

Let me guess he "isnt happy in his relationship" and wants to "leave her soon"?

[SherrySher]

This man has proved to you that he is a cheater. If you proceed with this and he ends up being with you, you will be the girlfriend and you will be on the receiving end of him messing around with a woman some day behind your back. That's why it's never smart to get together with someone who is already involved.

You can ignore this and tell yourself "that no, you're special and your relationship is one of a kind, etc"...and go through the whole cycle until it's proven to you...but it will be proven to you.

This man does not have loyalty and cannot be trusted in a relationship.

And to answer your question, he is honestly a good player.

[greta96]

Wait, does he still have the girlfriend? If yes, then my advice is not only do not sleep with him, but also stop the makeout sessions and the texting right now! Don't be that ho that all girlfriends hate, you know, the one who doesn't care about stepping over others just because she wants the dud (yes I wrote dud, because that's what you would be getting in the end, a dud) for herself.

 

If he is currently single, then sure, you can continue hanging out, but why not do your best to find out for yourself whether he is being honest, instead of asking a board of people who have no way of knowing? We are not mind readers and we don't carry crystal balls...we can't tell what goes on in some guy's head. You on the other hand, why don't you take your time to get to know him, go on dates with him (dates =/= his place or a bedroom), before jumping straight into sex with him? That's the only way you can see for yourself whether he's a player or he's honest about his intentions. What's the rush with the sex? If he is genuine, there will be plenty of time for sex, right now your focus should be getting to know him without the physical component in the mix. Be patient and see who he is first. Sex can wait, and so can he. And if he can't, then you have your answer right there.

 

So first things first, is he still in a relationship and cheating?

[Hollyj]

Really nice! You're simply a side piece. If he respected, or liked you, he would have broken up with his gf, before he started flirting with you. Wake up!!!

 

How would you like to be the girlfriend? Pretty sleazy on both of your parts!

 

Do better for yourself, and others.

[Wiseman2]

Unfortunately it sounds like you are desperate for attention and a bf. No there's no future, you threw yourself at him so he figured 'what the heck i'll cheat on my real gf with this desperate/easy girl'.

 

If you want any sort of real relationship find a guy who doesn't have a gf and wants to date you.

I learnt he had a girlfriend. I kinda dared him to kiss me. I have a future with him?

[reinventmyself]

You dared a taken man to kiss you and now you've set the tone.

He has a girlfriend and you are accepting of the arrangement. If you weren't you wouldn't have engaged in flirting with an unavailable man and initiating physical contact.

He probably figures you don't care much either way or you would have set some limits.

I don't condone his flirting but seeing you crossed the line I don't that this makes him the player.

[lostlove76]

What makes you think it's okay to flirt with another woman's boyfriend? Would you want that done to you? I bet not. Don't be so low class. Find your own man, someone without a girlfriend.

[HeartGoesOn]

Where would you find "honesty" in a guy who cheats on his girlfriend? At any rate, never lose sight of the fact that history has a tendency to repeat itself.

 

What a catch!

[Gary Snyder]

Don't mess with a man who already has a girlfriend, his heart is taken. If they don't love you, you have no hook and they can bail anytime.