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So, as the title says; she texed me today. She broke up with me around 4 months ago; leaving me completely and utterly devastated, It still pains me everyday. So, I decided some weeks ago that I wanted to move on, that I wanted to heal, I deleted her phone number from my phone, all images I had of her and that we had, and I unfollowed her from all social media. It is still very hard for me to move on and heal; people online make it sound so easy. Anyways, today she contacted me, I dont know if I should reply or just dont answer. I don't feel ready, I dont want to get hurt.

What are your thoughs on what I should do?




ps. sorry for bad english.

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First of all, she sounds immature. She should not be calling you Dude. That just downplays the relationship level to friendship. She's SEEKING friendship. But you should NOT give her friendship because you're not ready for that. I think exes can become friends only if both parties have moved on and can think of each other fondly. Obviously, she has moved on, but you have not yet completely moved on.


Just tell her you can't give her the friendship. She should respect that.

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Delete her text and if possible change your phone number. You have to think of yourself at this point and you did all the right things by removing her number and photos. It will get better, honestly.


This ^^^. No, it's never easy, especially if you were the one who was dumped. But every time you have any contact with her, you will effectively pull the scab off your own healing.


Don't be that guy!

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Hmm...im going to take a slighty different approach on this..im only speaking for myself, but yano i think we can all agree it sucks to get dumped, esp when your the dumpee, some of us beg and plead,some dont. Are egos and selfesteem take a hit. Im only guessing here but id assume the breakup left you dazed and confused. During my breakup i wanted validation, i wanted to know i met something...right now my ex holds all the cards, i cant make him want me, nor would i want him to be with me out of pity, it has to be his own free will. With that being said i think alot of us wether we admitt it or not would love to dump the dumper. I think alot of us would like to get that ex text, that put us in an empowering position. I dont hate my ex by anymeans ( altho i have been feeling anger latly more) seems people say time lets you remember the good times..well as the dumpee im starting to remeber that it wasnt all good...over time i think the dumper though might remember the good times...this is assuming there was no abuse, or cheating ect. I dunno, at times i miss my ex, and at times im angry, at times im also content. I guess thats progress though. Its my mind finally starting to sort threw things and compartmentalize the breakup. If i was in your shoes getting a text from my ex would definitely cause some anxiety. However, at the same time id feel the tables have turned. All of a suden you want me now? My texts go ignored, you say no to friends and tell me to move on but now YOUR texting me? I dont know about the rest of you but id use that as a push forward. I wouldnt be a jerk about it, but still. Of corse i can say this now, but if i was in your shoes i dont know that i would want to rip my bandaid off just yet and talk to ex. You have come a long way. Dump the dumper and keep moving forward.

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