Why won't she stop?

[Bliss09]

My ex broke it off over a month ago. I went NC. I've been doing okay, and having a regular internal battle with myself wondering if I miss her..or just miss being in a relationship. NC has been great for me. I'm getting out, meeting new people, and honestly enjoying my freedom. I haven't thought about her as much I as I thought I would. But still of course, as any two year relationship I do have flashes of memories that just give me that uneasy feeling.

 

Long story short...my ex keeps texting me randomly, and it's driving me crazy. It's been about three times now. I haven't responded at all.

 

First time was asking about a t shirt...nothing of any significance or importance. Regular old T shirt. I didn't respond. Not worth breaking NC.

 

Second time was to ask for our apartment key back. No biggie..I get that one. I didn't respond and just stuck it in the mail the same day.

 

Third time was to tell me she got the key..and hopes I'll talk to her again someday..and she hopes all is well.

 

Bottom line is, why does she keep reaching out? I haven't responded, I've been doing my own thing. I don't text her back. But everytime she texts me it makes for an annoying day as I'm still not completely healed.

 

I mean she ended it, why try to maintain contact? Makes no sense.

[kbbcoop77]

Block her ...problem solved

[Almira23]

Because you do want to hear from her. If you did not want to hear from her then you would have blocked her number when your relationship ended. She's going to continue to reach out to you because she knows she isn't blocked and will continue to do so until you finally respond.

[HeartGoesOn]

You haven't gone "NC" if you're leaving a door open where she can contact you. Not to sound harsh, but if you found this to be truly "annoying" you would have blocked her by now.

 

In short, she clearly knows that you're taking the bait.

[charity]

Because its not so easy. Even being the dumper.. and even feeling that she has made the right decision , its probably still hard for her too.

[ControlDenied]

She is insecure. Wants to keep her options open. And the way you are dealing with it is very mature, it makes her doubt herself even more. Block her, she is bound to continue the same behavior.

[melancholy123]

You should have blocked her on day one of NC. She's pestering you because you let her. Blocking her will solve your problem.

[SherrySher]

Ending a relationship is never easy for either party. But in short, she is probably at times lonely and runs back to the familiar seeing if you will respond. It doesn't necessarily mean she wants to come back, it really could just be not being able to close the door completely out of ego or lonliness, or plain old curiosity. Difficult to tell for sure.

The only way to stop the texts completely is to block, but sounds as though you're having similar issues on breaking contact all together.

[Wiseman2]

Echoing the other advice, yes blocking will help you heal better and faster. The texts were purely logistical unfinished business. Fine, appropriate reasons to 'reach out'.

 

It doesn't sound like she's trying to 'maintain contact', just wrap up some unfinished details.

my ex keeps texting me randomly, and it's driving me crazy. It's been about three times now. I haven't responded at all. I mean she ended it, why try to maintain contact? Makes no sense.

[No1]

I hate blocking unless you are telling the other person why you are blocking them. All blocking does is create a different set of problems. Instead of calling or texting, they will come over to your house or where you work or call your family members to make sure you are okay. Blocking might sound great but its not a solution. Thats my opinion...

 

She is not getting the hint, and there could be a thousand reasons why she contacts you. It can be just as hard on her as it is on you but doesnt have the strength as you, maybe she misses you, letting you go is not as easy, or maybe another poster nailed it, who knows why. So rather than blocking her, why dont you just tell her to please stop and tell her why. Most of the time ignoring works. Sometimes it doesnt. This time its not working but then again it has only been a month. I understand if you dont want to talk to her but I see no problems with telling her to please stop. Thats my two cents.

[kbbcoop77]

Fine tell her then block. Really blocking is the way to healing, any contact will set u back in the early days..