Help me to undestand..

[alldaisies]

I am truly sad, a little less that a couple a days ago, but still sad and lost...

 

I will try to resume and make a long story short...

 

I have been part of these forum for some time now, I came here, when I was with suicidal thoughts, my life has been a rollercoaster for these last 7 -8 years. Many things has happened that has affected me deeply. I was harassed but I cannot prove it. The harassment and many other factor provoked in me a nervous break down that put me on medication and therapy. Well, I finally started feeling better, and I created a personal page on Facebook, under the option given for the page, I selected that I was a writer, I started writing about the current news, design, architecture, art, medicine, psychology, fictions stories, love, friendship, any subject. writing help me to: heal, let's go the pain, keep me connected with the world (I live very isolated, I miss family and friends), also help me to improve my writing skills and my English. Well, I have notice that for third time my post with political comments go public or get a peak of visits, and all the visits are like a massive horde against me. I have deal with that, because my point have been to connect people from all political tendencies and make them respect each other. I have kept my control, in front of people offending each others or name calling I have asked for more respect and the post that go to the extreme, I have deleted them. I do not want on my page republicans offending democrats or vice_versa. I born in Cuba and suffered in Venezuela, them I have my very strong reasons why I am worry for the country, why I do not like confrontation, and why I tend to be more a republican than a democrat, even so I am not a typical one. The last news I commented was one after Michelle speech at DNC, someone wrote in Kelly Clarkson twitter that he did not like the part of the speech where Michelle mentioned that she has lived in a house built by slaves. Kelly was not rude or went offering him, but she silenced him with her response, the man closed his account for the attacks. I use that as example of the thing that I consider should change. I mentioned that Michelle speech was excellent but I did not like it either. Without people asking me why, the attacked started, "dumb, stupid, b....." I do not know how many offenses more. Since I want to make a point, show them how people wrongly act, I keep my peace of mind, and started answering comments, very politely, I asked for respect, I asked to please do not use bad words. I explained why I did not like the speech. I asked them all to please keep the calm and talk. The one supporting me, that were the very few, also started offending the other side. It was terrible, but manageable, I was in control and people was reacting more positive and every one start coming to the same page. I do not mean with this that they accepted that I did not like the speech, but we started having a peaceful interchange. I was feeling well with that, because that was my point and what I want to be able to do. Well, a woman coming from nowhere, wrote to me:

 

"I'm not sure if I'm more irritated by your complete lack of understanding of how social media works, complete lack of understanding about how consequences work, complete lack of understanding of racism, complete lack of understanding of white privilege, or your complete lack of understanding of how to write a coherent sentence when your Facebook page says you are a writer. Basically, everything about you is a massive disappointment in regards to my expectations of human beings in general. Not to mention my expectations of professional writers. I feel strongly that you should perhaps consider a new career in favor of pursuing more education about life."

 

I cry friends, I cry as you do not have idea. In one second she brought me to the floor, took from me my resource to endurance the hard times and overcome all my difficulties in life. I felt like I was nothing, literally. I wrote back to her with tears covering my face, and she did not stop, she continue fighting against me, like she knew me and her mission was to hurt me very much. She did, she hurt me. I closed my page for a day, I relaxed, I try no to think about. I was again with the old desire of no living more. i felt devastated. I told her how bad I was feeling. She continue insulting me, she told me that I was trying to find allies playing the victim, she also told me that I had a borderline racism and many more things. I spent the night thinking in all her words. It was terrible for me and I still remember all she told me, like it was just right now. I could not understand the whys? I cannot understand how a person that do not know me can insult me so much and make so many wrong accusations. The harassment from the past make its presence again, all suddenly. The next morning a friend told me. Daisy, you do not have to close your page, you do not have to stop your dream just because one person hurt you and told you all of that. Are you going to run or are you going to face life? I opened my Facebook page again and I continue writing.

 

Words have a deep effect in people life, no idea if she realized that, most probably no, she laughed at the end, like she did not care. And this woman was for a day crying and sad, affected for the unfairness. But today I continue writing, and I used that sad event to write even more and to help others with that terrible example. I did not kill myself thanks to this forum and the people that was there for me, giving me a little hope and support. I thanks every day of my life that there are still people out there with good feelings and good values.

 

Tell me why me? Why they, the one following me and insulting me, most probably democrats or from the government, do that to me? Should I keep my silence in front of the things I consider important. Should I just tell what people want to hear. I have to agree with others for them treat me with respect. Did I overreacted? Tell me what I can do to forget those lacerating words and do not feel this sadness..

[ThatwasThen]

Does facebook not have a block function?

 

Hone your boundaries, schweety and learn to hit that block button. Don't allow cretins on the internet to dictate your feelings to you. When you feel that first niggling of being disrespected, you get rid of them for good.

 

Ignorant bullies exist. That doesn't mean we have to listen to them.

 

Just know that when talking politics, you're going to see a lot of differing opinions. Personal attacks and abuse have nothing to do with the state of affairs in the country.

 

I thanks every day of my life that there are still people out there with good feelings and good values.

Focus on those folks and their replies and dismiss the rest as irrelevant and block-worthy.

[alldaisies]

Does facebook not have a block function?

 

Hone your boundaries, schweety and learn to hit that block button. Don't allow cretins on the internet to dictate your feelings to you. When you feel that first niggling of being disrespected, you get rid of them for good.

 

Ignorant bullies exist. That doesn't mean we have to listen to them.

 

Thanks so much for your words. I want no to relate people words with the country in general, but sometimes result almost impossible. It is hard not to feel a kind of connection, when I remember that some years back I was able to have the same kind of conversation without so much confrontations. To keep my faith and trust in the country, I read a lot from some of those government public pages, those that have positive messages and good advices for the civilians. I remember my friends on the army and the navy, and their values. I want that magic formula that make people stop fighting for politic. We are all americans, humans, people with dreams and goals. Why is so difficult to live in peace and harmony? Maybe that woman was not a cretin, maybe she was a superior human being, with perfect writing skills and got offended for my lack of training, I do know what she was or is, but for sure she did not know how to treat others with a little respect, even less with compassion. Thanks again for reading and for be there for me, all help.

[ThatwasThen]

Next time just block people like her. There is no reasoning with people that go out of their way to offend by verbally abusing and taking an issue to a personal level.

 

Be well.