Only recently I'm un attracted to my partner and find him irritating?

[Nippa888]

So i really need someone to help me make sense of what i'm feeling, reasons why and perhaps what i could do? I've been with this guy for nearly two years. Things have gotten kind of weird lately. We've been having this on going problem (that i mentioned in a previous post) about his ex girlfriend being very very intertwined with his close friends and family and my inability to deal with it. Please don't tell me to find a way to deal with it or get over it because trust me i would have by now if i could . Before we got together i warned and said how i could not deal with that aspect only to be told it wouldnt happen and now it is. ANYWAYS we've been having alot of problems with it to the point where all i can see are two alternatives, he's unhappy because we arnt going to his friends things, OR i'm made miserable from being forced into these situations that can stay with me for months afterwards. Its made me very negative towards any kind of future mainly due to fear of arguments and unhappiness.

I've even been having this problem where i find him extremely irritating. Like i just want to be alone. Dont have any urge to be affectionate. And i'm even finding fault with the way he looks which i never even saw before like basic things like his hair or whatever. Things i cant really bring up or mention to him without hurting him and i'd rather not because there is probably something way deeper going on causing these feelings?

Ugh i still feel like i love him though. I'm really confused

please someone help me

[IAmFCA]

You're feelings originate from your sense of being trapped, being "forced" into situations with which you are uncomfortable.

 

It sounds like you two expect to do everything together. That's not necessary and not even recommended. Specific to your situation, you need to draw a boundary and stick with it. Let him go without you.

 

Would that solve it?

[Wiseman2]

It sounds like you resent him tremendously. Why is his ex still in the picture? It's ok to call it quits when it reaches a stand off and he simply betrays you and refuses to cut the ex loose as he promised. How can you build a relationship when he allows an interloper to block intimacy.

his ex girlfriend being very very intertwined with his close friends and family and my inability to deal with it.

[ParisPaulette]

The honeymoon period is over, this is who he is, this is how it will always be.

 

Stop looking for reasons and just go. You're already gearing up to walk away and yes, I think you should.

 

I would have been gone a loooooong time ago.