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Barely started w/him, missing him like crazy, will he contact me?

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I dated a guy for a month, then we did long distance for a month, I fell pretty hard. All this long distance dating was his idea. Come to find out he was distancing himself because of conflicting feelings and he is afraid to get hurt (his ex hurt him pretty bad). We haven't been intimate, so I know that is not the drive behind his intentions. He broke down on me telling me he wanted to figure things out and take things slow, he said he was close to saying I love you and was on the side of staying w/me. Then I tried to push a little and he bumped me down from gf (also his idea) to friends w/potential, he wanted to be alone and didn't me or him to get hurt. I didn't want a "break", but I knew he would leave anyways. I haven't heard from him in 4 days and I go from being ok to bawling my eyes out. I will be dating others, he wasn't thrilled about that and I'm leaving the ball in his court. I am going NC, I deleted his # and his FB, Will he contact me? I'm keeping my hopes way low and trying to get through every day.

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I haven't read your other threads, but what confuses me reading this is that you just posted advice on another thread saying that when someone breaks up with you, it's over. And on/off relationships rarely work out. (They don't).


Why would you even spend this kind of mental energy on someone who 'DOWNGRADES' you from gf to friends with 'potential'?? My guess is the ex, or other girls, is still in the picture and he wants to have his options open. Does that sound like a promising foundation for a future with someone?


Let him go. It doesn't matter why, and it REALLY shouldn't matter if he contacts you - you can't build a relatonship off of this. Time for you to accept this and move on and do the healing you need to do to have more luck in the future with someone new.

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I suggest you reread all the comments to your previous threads, out of respect for all that responded to you.

You have created 20 threads over this guy in a five week period.


I agree. Please re-read all previous comments.


OP, there really is no need to start a new thread every day about this same guy as it is all related. You can continue your discussions and questions in one thread from one day to the next. At this point it probably would be a better idea to start a journal.


As to your question in this thread: No-one can possibly know if he will contact you or not. Keep NC. This "relationship" barely got off the ground - you hardly know a person in 4 weeks - and it seems he wasn't interested at all. Your extreme overreaction to it ending is confusing and concerning. Learn to accept it and move on.

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Please stop obsessing and let this person go. You are driving yourself mad and it barely was anything to begin with. There are tons of other men in this world and someone out there is a much better match for you than this one. He does not want you. He sounds like a player who is no doubt chatting up more than just you. Cut him off and move on, you are wasting far too much mental energy on someone who is not bothered.

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You need to acknowledge this entire "relationship" which wasn't really was a fantasy that was all in your head. You don't even know this guy, really, how could you? It's been one month of dating and one month LDR.


You need to focus on what else is going on in your life that is so bad you'd rather focus on this than on that thing. And I say this, because I have been there. I recognize the signs. If the rest of your life was going great you'd barely even notice this guy was gone and/or you'd have been sad for a week or two then been back to life.


Look at what else you aren't facing--a toxic environment of a job, fights with your family, issues within yourself that make you unhappy? Focus on those and this obsession with someone you barely knew will end.

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