What was the meaning of my dream ?

[ThighQueen]

So I had this very odd dream last night about my ex boyfriend . I rarely dream about him . We broke up about year and half ago , longer probably . I just graduated high school by the way.

The relationship consisted of me just then realizing my mental problems- consisting of Depression(Which I already had for years before that), OCD, and Anxiety(Caused by the OCD, I think) . So I was just coming to terms with my problems and I didn't know how to deal with them. So I was really needy . I used him as my drug to forget my problems . I would get really depressed and thought he didn't love me if he wasn't talking to me, or I would think something really bad happened to him . Sense when we first got together he got in a car wreck (not a bad one , but still . ) So he wouldn't talk to me for three hours and I would freak out that it happened again .

So when we broke up he told friends I was needy and paranoid. So I thought everybody hated me . I also thought I was worth nothing and that no guy deserved to deal with me . I stopped talking to a lot of people and for the past year have been working hard to understand my issues and what not . He also did a lot of messed up things also , like lying - dating one of my friends, acted like he just did not care at all .

 

The dream was behind this house and it was as if we had school there , but we also lived there- in these small little log cabins . I had two parts of this dream , but I remembered the first part after having this part yesterday .

So this first one , one of the log cabins collapsed and people were in it. We all knew they all died . I found out my ex was in it and I thought it was hilarious and I was like screaming that he deserved it .

Then Yesterday I had the next part and this the same thing happened the cabin collapsed and this time I couldn't walk away from it and I kept staring at it and I was freaking out . I couldn't believe he died and nobody was doing anything . Nobody cared , nobody was trying to get him out . Mean I knew he was dead , but still , nobody was even checking .

 

So that whole day when I woke up I just felt really weird .

 

The relationship really messed me up , though . So I thought I was over it finally , but it is making me think I really still care . Which mean I know I care about him, but I don't love him anymore nor do I wanna be with him .

I just want opinions on what people think the dream meant .

[Inner Fire]

I wouldn't worry about the random timing of the dream - even once we are over someone our brain likes to bring things up sometimes.

 

As far as I can figure the cabins collapsing signifies your relationship ending. In the dream your ex actually signifies yourself, and your reactions to the death are your reactions towards yourself after the breakup. One part of you feels - man, I suck so much I must just deserve this - that was the first dream. The second dream your other feelings - why does no one care? Why did no one want to help me when I was suffering?

 

Essentially it's just a re-hash of your emotions following the breakup. As for why you had this dream now, it probably has little or nothing to do with your ex and more likely is related to your current emotional state. Are you feeling anxiety about your own self worth or other people's seeming lack of regard towards you? If so, it makes a lot of sense that you would dream this now.

[ThighQueen]

Yeah actually I have been feeling really down lately about my worth and have been feeling like nobody cares lately . That would make so much sense . I didn't even think about that .

[Wiseman2]

He's dead to you now.

Mean I knew he was dead