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Hi guys,

 

I'm not feeling too well today and I am in serious need of guidance because I cannot assess the situation properly/rationally at this stage.

 

A few months ago, I moved to a foreign country for work after being stuck at my parents' abusive home for nearly 8 months of unemployment. I left on bad terms and I therefore have since cut ties. It was a relief when I finally landed a temporary position abroad. During the first two months of me being here, I had a successful interview with a major company which later gave me a verbal offer. The ordeal started when the company did not manage to provide me with a proper contract for months on end due to budget reasons I assume. It wasn't until two months and a half after the interview that they issued me an official offer and a contract.

 

During this time of waiting for the contract to come through, my actual temporary employment ended and though I was looking for a job, I didn't secure anything. Hence, my landlord/roommate kindly offered me to stay (rent-free) until I got my work situation sorted. I can't thank her enough for that. She's done more than anyone would have done. I'm however adamant that I will be paying her the rent I didn't pay when I get my next paycheck. I have asked her multiple times to come to an agreement for the bills, but she always said "we'll talk about this later" and is out the door.

 

My roommate is moving abroad next month but she is also supposed to be away for the next two weeks. Hence, although she initially told me she'd move out in August, she's choosing to move out next week. She sent me a message on Facebook a few days ago stating that I would need to move out "sometime" next week. She didn't give me a proper day, she just said "sometime next week" which is very very short notice. It's her house, she's free to do as she pleases.

 

The problem is that I got my contract which is contigent on successfully completing the background checks. The background check started last week at which point, everything was fine with my roommate/landlord because she hadn't yet told me I'd need to move out because she's moving out. The background check is not done yet. I started looking for accomodation in the city where I'd be working. No landlord replied (I contacted 50+ landlords) except one who happened to have replied when my roommate/landlord asked me to move out. I went on a whim, visited the apartment and secured it with a deposit.

 

Now, I realize how much of an idiot I am. I secured housing in a city where I'm supposed to be moving to (where accommodation is very hard to find, especially as the offices are slightly remote and the apartment's location was perfect) except the background check isn't even finished yet. My roommate let me stay for another two weeks which coincides with the start of the lease. I haven't signed the lease yet. I only secured with a deposit.

 

I'm under a lot of pressure because if something happens with the background check, my deposit is partially gone. However, the company would want me to start as soon as possible if everytjing goes fine, so I would have wound up homeless since accommodation (within reasonable commute) is very hard to find over there. I want to pay my roommate/landlord rent for the next two weeks, but if I do, it will drain my budget for when I move out. I asked repeatedly her to give me an amount for the bills so I can contribute and she always tell me "we'll arrange this later, it's no bother" and goes out the door.

 

If I fly and stay at my parents only to come back two weeks later, it won't solve anything and will be just as expensive. They don't want me to come back there anyway. They told me that.

 

This job offer really left me in limbo for months (from April until now) because the process has been very slow. I would have moved out in May had everything gone properly with the offer and contract. I'm stuck in a limbo now.

 

I have no one to turn to. No friends and no family to help. I've been crying all night because I feel the pressure from every angle and I don't know how to proceed, especially as I now have to be careful with finances. I'm thinking I made a mistake securing the apartment, but since I only have one week left until the end of the background check, if everything goes well, they'd want me to start right away. Have am I made a mistake securing the apartment? Should I fly back and stay at my parents until I move into the new apartment?

 

Even though my roommate/landlord allowed me to stay for another two weeks, I feel uncomfortable now. I'd prefer to find a solution to move out asap.

 

I'm so confused. Any help would be greatly appreciated because I don't know how to sort this mess out. I don't even have an income since I can't collect unemployment over here.

Edited by RuedeRivoli
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I think you played it very well in the circumstances, and I don't think your roomate is too concerned over a matter of two weeks. All I would say is once you get your contract secure an overdraft facility with your bank if possible.

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Stop creating drama and learn how to say thank you and accept assistance people are offering to you gracefully.

Take care of your finances and living situation as already planned.

Do you know of anything in your background that should be problematic? If not, then quit fretting over it.

 

Once you have moved out and settled in, then call your landlord up and take him out to a nice dinner and thank him for his kindness. The same for your roommate once she is back from wherever. Or in her case, you can always get her address to where she is going and send her the money you think you might owe along with a nice card or something to let her know how much you appreciated her help when you were down.

 

Ultimately, understand this - these people are helping you out, because they believe in you, like you and think you will OK in the end but right now you need a hand and they are willing to lend it of their own free will.

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Stop creating drama and learn how to say thank you and accept assistance people are offering to you gracefully.

Take care of your finances and living situation as already planned.

Do you know of anything in your background that should be problematic? If not, then quit fretting over it.

 

Once you have moved out and settled in, then call your landlord up and take him out to a nice dinner and thank him for his kindness. The same for your roommate once she is back from wherever. Or in her case, you can always get her address to where she is going and send her the money you think you might owe along with a nice card or something to let her know how much you appreciated her help when you were down.

 

Ultimately, understand this - these people are helping you out, because they believe in you, like you and think you will OK in the end but right now you need a hand and they are willing to lend it of their own free will.

 

I'm treating my roommate/landlord (she's both) her to dinner next week to thank her for her kind help! I was looking for a gift hamper to give her before I leave with a nice card. I already thanked her in person yesterday.

 

No, I'm not afraid of anything in all honesty. Everything I stated on my CV/background form is accurate and backed up with official references, degree statements and payslips. My grades are accurate, dates of graduation accurate, job titles + dates + salary accurate (backed with references for each one). I submitted official proof of everything I stated along with my online form/CV. I don't have any criminal record, no even a parking ticket since I don't drive. My credit check came back clear.

I'm just stressed out because I haven't heard from them at all though I was told I'd only hear if there is something that needs clarification/further information.

 

You're right though. I think I am creating some kind of drama in my head. I need to calm down. Thanks!

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I think you played it very well in the circumstances, and I don't think your roomate is too concerned over a matter of two weeks. All I would say is once you get your contract secure an overdraft facility with your bank if possible.

 

Thank you! That's actually a good idea I hadn't thought of (hopefully, I will never have to use it).

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