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We broke up ,he didn't fight for me .But I still miss him .


IndieTalks

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So ,I was dating this guy ,called Sam for a while (coming up to four months ) .And I fell hard .But not like crazy girl hard XD

But anyhow ,after about the 101th time of him trying tot persuade me to have sex (that I was no where near ready for ,I wanted emotional stability ,and to be on some sort of protection .) I denied him again ,and it was then that he turned around and said that he felt that sometimes felt "that something was missing " that "he didn't fit in my life " that he questioned the relationship thinking that I needed someone "more understanding and kinder" .At the time I reassured him that he was fine in both cases .But after I had heard that he felt "something was missing " .I ended the relationship ,not wanting to be in a one sided relationship ,knowing that what he said wasn't right .He chased me to the door ,and on final parting said "But I don't want this to end YET" .I as you might of guessed ,I was kinda upset .He tried messaging me ,with "Are we gunna talk yet " .So I made it clear ,that the relationship was dead after he didn't even try to sort it out ,he just simply put "I don't know what to say anymore ,sorry".But to me ...that relationship didn't feel dead .Anyhow time has now passed ,and although I might not cry so much ,and I'm getting on with life ,focusing on friends college etc .I still miss him ,I still miss the connection ,the company .Every potential new partner ,well is compared almost to him .And I'm sat here worried ,that will I ever feel the same ? Which I know is ridiculous ,because it wasn't even a long period we were dating for ,and I guess one sided .But I was happy ...for once I was happy ,and felt alive ,desired .And now ,to be honest ,I'm just feeling flat .I miss him ,and the truth is he doesn't miss me .Not at all ,I've passed his path a few times ,and he's just gone by me like I wasn't even there ,with a small smirk on his face ,he's already sleeping with others ,he told me while we were dating that's how he gets over things .And to the added bonus ,he's gossiping about me ,and telling everyone "There's more to the breakup ,that even I know ." .Which to be honest isn't helping .

 

I feel pathetic after writing all that out ,but I think its kinda helped me ,my friends and family ...well if I get moments of sadness ,they tell me "that I'm being stupid " or "Its not worth being talked about " and simply move on .But ,I guess sometimes ,I would just like to talk about it ,you know ? maybe that's a way of healing for me .I came to this forum ,and wrote all of this ,I guess to ask if anyone knows how to get rid of an ex from mind and life ,or even just how to stop feeling for them ? I'm sick of caring for someone ,who probably hasn't even shed a tear for me .

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