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Have to get rid of my cat of 9 years :(


Lotusavx

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I'm so sad...today the day that I am moving has finally come. My ex ended our live in relationship 1 month ago. My cat who I love so much and have had for 9 years came to live with us after I moved out and in with him. We both love her so much, but neither of us where we are living can take her! I am living with my mom who is terribly allergic and he is back with his parents for a while, who is also allergic and has no room. I have to give her up to someone and I'm just so sad. I can't even look at her. Moving and a break up is hard enough now I have to go through loosing my cat does anyone have some advice?

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Call me a rebel, but I'd just deal with the possibility of forfeiting my security deposit and bring the cat in anyway, and that's assuming the cat is enough of a destructive spaz for the management to even realize a cat was there after a decent deep cleaning.

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Do you have a friend who can take the cat at least temporarily?

If not, can your mom be talked into taking a daily antihistamine so you can bring the cat there? I know many people who do this and are fine.

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It is hard though cupcake when you have family members that are allergic . For instance my mom is so allergic that she's almost anaphylactic . As in her tongue and lips start to swell up and she coughs and coughs and coughs until she can't breath. Hence my mom only visits me a couple times year because I have cats and she can only stay in my house an hour before we have to go out all day .

 

Myself ,I am allergic to cats but I have three but I am not severe .

 

I don't think this person is rehoming her pet just because she doesn't want to look after it . She sounds very genuinely upset . But if it comes down to potentially killing your mother ......

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I have severe allergies - cats are the worst, then dogs and then hay. For some weird reason two of my ex partners and my current boyfriend all three of them had two cats each. I sucked it up the first two times. I wasn't living with my first boyfriend obviously so I didn't really had a say in it and never said anything. Whenever I stayed at his house though I was sick for a week.

My ex had two cats and I lived with them for five years - then I got a long infection and my doctor told us to seriously consider to get rid of the cats because it was making my condition worse (asthma). We were in luck that a distant family member wanted to take over the cats.

 

When I started to date my current boyfriend I couldn't sleep at his house. We tried a couple of times, of course, but only to be leaving his house in the middle of the night; sick and tired. When we moved in together we asked Facebook for any takers. It felt safer to give the cats to someone whom we would know and keep in contact with us about how the cats are doing.

 

I was really upset both times when we had to found new homes for the cats (my ex and me and me and my current boyfriend). I actually cried the first time and had a very ty week all together- those were mine cats too as I had lived with them for five years. I know it was/is for my health but I still feel the guilt and the shame. Please don't shame people who are having a hard time already that they have to find a new home for their cat.

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Definitely ask all your friends and family members if they couldn't take your cat for a short time while you work out your living situation.

 

I have kept cats for 2 people in similar situations, where they temporarily couldn't take the cat with them but didn't want to give the cat up, and was very happy to be able to help. The owners just paid for food/litter/vet expenses. Some family also recently kept my cat for six months, and now he and I are reunited.

 

If you have already found a new home for your cat and are set on giving her to new owners, you can reassure yourself that this separation will be much harder on you than on the cat. I am a big cat lover and have had cats all my life, and I have found them to be quite resilient and adaptable. In the cases above where I kept animals for a short while, they all seemed to feel at home very fast and didn't seem homesick or like they were missing their owners. It will be so hard for you, but if the cats go to a good home, they will be happy. The only adaptation issue I have seen is when cats join a household where there are already other pets - that can create some serious problems and tensions.

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I'm so sad...today the day that I am moving has finally come. My ex ended our live in relationship 1 month ago. My cat who I love so much and have had for 9 years came to live with us after I moved out and in with him. We both love her so much, but neither of us where we are living can take her! I am living with my mom who is terribly allergic and he is back with his parents for a while, who is also allergic and has no room. I have to give her up to someone and I'm just so sad. I can't even look at her. Moving and a break up is hard enough now I have to go through loosing my cat does anyone have some advice?

 

I haven't read the entire thread....but--sometimes veterinary offices will try to place an animal for adoption. Some places will keep them if you pay fees. So sorry about your animal. Have you tried shelters that don't utilize euthanasia? Sometimes they'll foster the animal if you agree to pay for upkeep....best wishes!!!

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So many people rehome their pets and it upsets me. You chose to have a pet, you need to take care of it no matter what. Find a friend or foster for a few months. DO NOT give it to a shelter, that's just cruel.

 

Agreed. You adopt a pet, it should be for life. If circumstances change, then you take your pet into account the way you would your child.

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she hasn't said she is going to bring the cat to the shelter. Her words were: 'to someone'. And who says she's only just taking care of it right now? She probably has made an arrangement already. She is just sad people and looking for some support.

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Heather dawn.. obviously don't know the whole situation..but I still have my apartment until the end of the month and me and my ex are going to check the cat daily and be with her until we find her a home. I couldn't stay in the apartment any longer for many reasons, and this is the only week I can move since it conflicts with work. Please don't be so rude, you have no idea who is going through tough times.

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Agreed. You adopt a pet, it should be for life. If circumstances change, then you take your pet into account the way you would your child.

 

There is no way I take on having a pet unless I consider every possible circumstance and obstacle before doing so. If there is any chance (that I am aware of) that I can't keep the pet for it's life's duration, I just don't do it.

Not to jump on the OP and make her feel worse than she already does. I think you should consider every possible option before turning that cat over to anyone.

It's a responsibility.

 

My friend had to move across state and had two cats. She was really fortunate because one of her coworkers husband took an early disability/retirement and they welcomed her two little boy cats into a loving home.

She was absolutely devastated having to give them up, but very grateful for the circumstances.

It happens. Just keep at it until you figure out a way to either keep her or find the best possible home for her.

 

My moms elderly neighbor recently passed away. The daughter is allergic to cats and tried to rehome it. She ended up bringing `Angie' home with her and her cat hating husband and Angie are now inseparable! That and a little Claritin, Angie is one lucky cat. So are her new parents. No one is more surprised then they are.

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Okay, possible places: get on the phone right now and find any and all:

 

a) no kill shelters

b) foster pet parents in your area

c) good friends or other family

d) vets offices are sometimes a good resource for these too

e) if you live in a military town find out if they have resources for soldiers that have to leave pets behind when they're deployed--sometimes they have the best resources

f) take her with you, keep her in a separate room from your mom, continue to work on steps a through e until you find someone.

 

I'm not going to give you a hard time, because at least you didn't do the monstrous thing of simply leaving her at the side of the road. But those are your options. Never take her to the city animal control places or pounds. But do keep digging, because someone out there will want her, will take her.

 

I'm sorry you are having to leave her, that's so sad. My sympathies, but right now you need to get online and on the phone and literally not stop, call every place twice even. It takes persistence sometimes and worst-case scenario you take her with you to your mom's and you figure out a way to keep her separated until you can get her to another home.

 

Check this page and see if there are resources:

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Keep looking for a place to live. There are tons of apartments that take cats but not dogs. If I had cats instead of dogs, I would have been able to take my pick on where to live. Even if you have to negotiate slightly more time where you are at, you really need to put on the adult pants and take responsibility for your cat. I am sorry the relationship is over - but if you both love the cat - one of you will step up and get a short term roomie situation with someone who owns a home or is cat friendly if you can't afford to be on your own. There are room for rent situations that will let you have a cat in the room. There could be pet sitters and foster rescues that you could call to see if they could refer you to someone who could take your cat for 30 days while you found cat friendly lodging or knew landlords that accepted cats.

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This may sound harsh but how xan you abandon your cat of 9 years? You wouldnt do that to a child when animals go to shelters they have 72 hours before they are euthanized and senior cats are VERY unlikely to be first adopted not to mentiom the heart break pets feel when they are abandom or rehomed I think both of you need to figure it out Is live in my car before i gave up my pomeranian

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Heather dawn.. obviously don't know the whole situation..but I still have my apartment until the end of the month and me and my ex are going to check the cat daily and be with her until we find her a home. I couldn't stay in the apartment any longer for many reasons, and this is the only week I can move since it conflicts with work. Please don't be so rude, you have no idea who is going through tough times.

 

So you're going to leave your poor cat alone in an empty apartment, scared and confused, because you couldn't be bothered to figure out a solution to this situation in a timely manner?

 

That poor cat. I hope her next home is with someone responsible enough to take care of her forever.

 

Sorry, sticking to my "rude" stance.

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OP, I think you're getting heat here, because you make it sound like you just didn't handle this in a timely fashion. I don't know if that's true, I hope it isn't, but the fact is you need to view this cat the same way you would a child. At nine years of age she is your baby and I get that.

 

So keep pushing, don't panic, just focus everything you've got on finding her a home. And yeah, while you're at it, make the ex do the same thing. She was his cat for nine years too, if he at all loves her even if you two aren't staying together he can at least be making some effort.

 

Regardless hoping you find a solution for your kitty and you. Keep pushing.

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I still don't understand why you can't just put the cat in a carrier and bring it into the apartment at like midnight. You don't even have to be sneaky about it. It's a cat.

 

If the manager finds cat hair or pee on the carpet during their final walkthrough, so what? They'll keep your deposit and you'll still have your cat. I couldn't imagine not at least trying.

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