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Asked out a girl, what does her response mean?


somerandomguy1

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So there's this girl who I met about 9 months ago. The first two times we talked to each other, in the library, for about 2 hours each, we had really good conversations and hit it off really well. After those 2 times, we occasionally run into each other, but not often, sometimes out on the street, and at 2 student organization socials. The few times we had a chance to talk each other, we start off the conversation ok and then she becomes incredibly awkward. I figured it's most likely because she either suspects I like her or she likes me back.

 

But, I was too much of a coward and backed out of asking her out each of times.

 

So anyways, when I ran into her again on the streets yesterday, I finally was able to muster enough courage to ask her out for coffee. She told me that she's studies often at the cafe near where she lives and that I'm always welcome to drop by and chat.

 

Ok, I know that I moved waaaay to slowly and I was a real coward the past few months trying to ask her out. I better not repeat this mistake again for future girls.

 

But for now, how should I interpret her response? If she really wanted to reject me, she could've said she was busy studying for finals or whatever. Why would she give me the location of where I can find her often? But then again, could her response be an implicit rejection? I mean it's possible she studies at the cafe often, but that may not be the only place she studies and now, she'll know to avoid that particular cafe to avoid seeing me in case I go there. Maybe that was her way of coming up on the spot the gentlest way to turn me down. We never ran into each other at the cafe before, but that's because I ever only visited there twice before and only quickly grabbed something to go.

 

What do you think her response more likely is. A maybe, or a no?

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You asked her out, she told you that it would be on her own terms, which will be when she's busy (who would bother a person who is studying ?), and not during her free time.

 

She gently brushed you off (as far as dating is concerned).

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It means she sees you as a friend. She likes you but not enough to go on a date with you.

 

we're incredibly awkward around each other, well she is at least when we talk. We also don't see each other or communicate often after the first few encounters. Acquaintances I guess but I see your point.

 

I agree, she's romantically interested in you. If she was, she would have reacted positively to your request and jumped at the chance to spend time with you

 

I think you skipped a word, you mean not romantically interested

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She isn't interested. She informed you where she might be, so that she doesn't have to put any energy into dealing with you. IF you see her, you can say "hello".

 

Your window of opportunity closed wayyyyy back after the long conversation with no follow up. Now she realizes it could take another year before the next conversation and it isn't worth her time.

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I would go and meet her at the cafe. What's the worst that will happen? You two can talk and see how things go.

 

If it doesn't work out then at least you know that you tried. And you will never second guess yourself. I wouldn't analyze it. You'll just drive yourself nuts.

 

Good luck.

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Deal with what you know. Everything else is speculation. You asked her out, she gave you opportunity. It's up to you to do with it what you want. I don't think it would hurt to meet her and get to know her better. You'll get a better feel for the situation. after a couple of coffees. Relax. Nothing venture, nothing gained.

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The only opportunities you regret in life are the ones you never take, just like now are kicking yourself for not asking her out sooner, but all things happen for a reason and maybe in the future you will have learned from this and act a little sooner.

 

Nevertheless I think it's worth going and seeing her at the café she suggested, all people react differently to being asked out and only you can really gauge what the situation was when you asked her. In 10 years time I guarantee you will only kick yourself more if you remember her as the girl you never tried with. Sure, she might not being romantically interested, but she might also be, and that you gave it a shot.

 

Good luck.

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