Jump to content

Recommended Posts

So here's my situation:

 

I'm from Ohio, and I've been talking to this girl for over a year now that i met on Tagged, "a social media site for meeting new people". I initiated conversation with her because i thought she was gorgeous and we talked through that site's messenger for a couple months before i was comfortable giving her my phone number. It turned out that the both of us had somewhat recently gotten out of a bad relationship that ended with a bad breakup, so we kind of helped each other through those struggles and helped each other move on. we kept texting each other every day and still do to this day but recently things have really faded from friendship to a romantic relationship. But I am a little skeptical, and there is a small part in the back of my head telling me that she isn't exactly who she says she is. The first thing that makes me a little skeptical was on her profile it said she was from California, but when i asked her what it was like living there she said: well i actually live in arkansas. When i asked her why she didn't have arkansas listed she said that she didn't want her ex-boyfriend finding her on there because he was abusive and stalkerish, which throughout talking to her that story never changed.#2 reason I'm skeptical: She also lied about her age on her profile. the profile said she was 19, but it came up in conversation that she was actually 17 and about to graduate highschool. That was a huge dilemma for me because i was 21 at the time. I never said anything sexual, or anything that would be considered wrong to her even before i knew she was 17. I was only looking for a friend and someone to talk to. #3 makes me wonder: a week or two after exchanging phone numbers, i logged back into Tagged and noticed she had deleted her account, which had not been active for very long in the first place. i asked her why she deleted it and she told me that she had me to talk to and that she didnt want all the creepy people on there messaging her anymore. #4 something i thought was odd: she doesn't have a facebook account. she told me she didn't have one because her ex-boyfriend would post things on their that would start drama and create some bad situations. which i thought was understandable if everything she told me about her ex was true. but i tried finding her on other sites like instagram, tumblr, snapchat, twitter, etc. and i didn't find her on them.

As time passed and we got to know each other better, we started talking on the phone. we'd talk for hours, sometimes 3-4 hours. even now, we talk on the phone all the time. a couple months ago i tried to get her to skype with me and she agreed to but then when we were supposed to skype that night she stopped talking to me, then i didn't from her for almost a whole week. she told me that something happened with her phone and it died on her so she had to get a new one. about a week later i tried again to get her to skype and she said the wifi at her college wasn't working. I got the feeling that maybe she didn't really want to skype and i asked her if she was okay with it, and i told her i didn't want to push for something if she wasn't comfortable with it. she told me she was fine with skyping it just happened so happened to not work both times we tried. so them probably two weeks later i ask to skype again and again i get an excuse. So i ask her again if she's comfortable with the whole skype thing, and she tells me that she doesn't really want the first time she meets me to be on video chat. I then open up to her and be 100% honest with her to tell her that there is a small part in my head that thinks there's a possibility she isn't real. which of course she was hurt by and hardly talked to me for a few days, until i finally got her to talk about why she was upset about that.

 

I'm really falling for this girl, but I'm afraid of that chance that she could be fake. I need some help, and I didn't know who to talk to so I really hope someone here can help.

Link to post
Share on other sites

You are falling for the fantasy you have created in your head. She has lied about enough things that you should be cutting contact. No 17 her old on the planet isn't on FB. She isn't who she says she is....at all.

 

Getnoff the phone and back I to real life.

Link to post
Share on other sites

See that was my thought too about the Facebook thing, but I thought the ex-bf thing could explain it. I've been skeptical and careful from the beginning, making sure to pay close attention to stories to make sure they match up and never change.

 

Are there any ways I make sure she is who she says she is?

Link to post
Share on other sites

No. And I would invest any more time in doing so. How many lies are OK? Seven but not eight?

She won't Skype...so my guess she is nothing.like her.picture. She is a 17 yr old highschool student who likely has never had a boyfriend for any number of reasons.

 

Get out and date...where you live.

Link to post
Share on other sites

You have to be careful. There are a lot of girls (yes, girls) who are in HS or even college who don't feel good about their looks and feel they can't get a "real" boyfriend so they catfish guys on the web. Sometimes they will meet up, sometimes they don't just to perpetuate the fantasy. It's a real problem, unfortunately. That's what it sounds like to me.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Catfished!! I agree, she likely looks NOTHING like the pics and therefore cannot Skype. Ask her about snapchat, I bet it'll be more excuses. Anyway, she's a minor. She may be younger than 17, ya just never know - You can get yourself into boiling water that will haunt you for life if she's a minor.

 

Anyway, stop the fantasy. Block her. If you google her phone number or "pictures" maybe you can get enough info to call her bluff on her deception.

Link to post
Share on other sites

OP do you have a picture from the site you met? Sometimes you can actually copy the link to it then search it in google. If you go to google then click images then click on the little camera icon in the search bar and paste the pic, you might find out who it really belongs to. Let me know if this works for you.

Link to post
Share on other sites

There is such a rash of those who seek out electronic relationships in lieu of real life ones.

Some of these people are otherwise lonely and struggle making genuine connections.

I feel some compassion for them but certainly not to the point that I can give them my time.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...