Need help understanding the 'signs'

[Oxford123]

So I have been getting to know a man at work and having lunches with him. We are both divorced. I am agonising over whether he is into me or not- the signs are really confusing me! We are both senior managers and have a lot to lose if one of us makes a move and the other doesn't reciprocate.

We get on brilliantly, great conversation, loads in common, laughing etc. But no touching and no asking me out- aaaargh!

 

Here are some of the things he has done which confuse me....

Shown me pictures of himself on holiday wearing nothing but shorts (pictures were of him quite a bit younger!)

Talked about past and current flirtations with other women- why would he do that!?

Made jokes about me sitting close to him- when I backed off commented later that I never sat near him!

 

So how can I tell??

[Batya33]

Can you ask him to have lunch with you during the work day? Sometimes one on one time away from the office will give you the information you need.

[Oxford123]

Thanks but we do have 1 on 1 lunches. I feel perhaps he is flirting and seems to want to get me on his own - but then nothing happens

[Batya33]

Perhaps he is concerned about dating someone at work?

[Willywagtail]

You should relish and enjoy the friendship rather than looking for signs.

 

If he hasn't obviously made any moves, then don't go there. Better to be safe than sorry.

 

Work romances can go pear shaped very quickly, and are to be avoided if you have the choice!

[Andrina]

Most new relationships don't work out, so if you dated and it fizzled, you'd have the awkward situation of seeing each other every day. Also, he's not shy. If was really into you, he'd ask you out. More likely, he likes the ego boost that you have a crush on him but won't ask you out because he's either dating someone else ore he's just not that into you. I'd stop the one-sided emotional affair by ending those lunches and treating him like any other co-worker. If it's a bf you want, put your emotional energy elsewhere and take steps toward that goal.

[catfeeder]

We are both senior managers and have a lot to lose if one of us makes a move and the other doesn't reciprocate.

 

If you're both senior managers, you both have a lot to lose by making a move, regardless.

 

Think.