tecc94454 Posted November 14, 2015 Posted November 14, 2015 My boyfriend of a few months said I love you and I didn't say it back. I do care about him a great deal but I just wasn't ready to say it. My last relationship ended badly and because of that I think I am scared to say that to him. I didn't tell him that, but I did panic and say I was surprised he said that. I know it hurt his feeling and embarrassed him a lot that I said that. The next day he just wanted to pretend it didn't happen. Its been about a week and we still have not talked about it. I feel like it should be discussed be because now its making things awkward. I'm not sure if I should though?
mhowe Posted November 14, 2015 Posted November 14, 2015 Discussing it would make it MORE awkward. You can't feel what you don't feel. However, using past injuries to justify your emotional distance isn't right either.
annie24 Posted November 14, 2015 Posted November 14, 2015 Welcome to ENA. I would talk to him about it to clear the air. I don't know what is going on in his head, but as a person who said, "I love you" and didn't hear it back.... that was the beginning of the end.
Dottieflanogon Posted November 14, 2015 Posted November 14, 2015 Nope I wouldn't say anything if your are not ready to say it back "I love you" isn't a question. I think you just wait and see how things unfold
ThatwasThen Posted November 14, 2015 Posted November 14, 2015 Are you fond of him? Would you like to continue seeing him to figure out if you are able to love him back or are you just with him so that you're not alone?
tecc94454 Posted November 14, 2015 Author Posted November 14, 2015 I care about him a lot and I do think I will love him.
ThatwasThen Posted November 14, 2015 Posted November 14, 2015 Then just tell him that you are very fond of him, tell him you like him, hug him and then get on with getting to figure out, through actions and dating and getting to know him if you can love him back. You're not ready to say it yet so don't let not saying it to him put a wedge between the good thing you both are working up to.
annie24 Posted November 14, 2015 Posted November 14, 2015 I care about him a lot and I do think I will love him. I would tell him that it's just too soon for you, but you feel things are on the right track. Just so he knows where your head is that. I don't know - I say this because I was in a situation where I was dating a guy for 6 months and I said it and he didn't say it back. He eventually told me a few things (he wasn't quite feeling it, but had other issues in his life, he thought maybe once they were resolved, he would be ready to say it). However, in conversations with friends, he would refer to me as "the woman he loved." So, that was confusing. Anyway, I'm just extrapolating from my experience, but I'd want to know what the "barriers" are. And honestly, 3 months is really a short amount of time, so I totally understand if you're not ready to say it just because you don't know him all that well yet, but you may be ready in 6 months, or whatever, as long as things keep going well. I (obviously!) don't know where his head is so maybe talk to him?
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.