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How do I know if I should ask her out?


abaco

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Posted

The woman I want to ask out I knew 5 years ago when she was a personal training client of mine. I would always be bragging to her about how great my wife was and telling her stories about my son who at the time was 2. Now I have divorced for almost 2 years and I'm trying to get my life back on track. I met with her 9 months ago regarding my mortgage and we had a great conversation. At the time she was going through a divorce. After our meeting I asked her out. She said yes and seamed excited about the idea. I contacted her about going out and left a message but she never called back. I had people tell me including members on here that I should have waited till her divorce was final. As I said it's 9 months later, I emailed her last week to talk with her about a home equity loan. Her reply email was playful and friendly. We just talked on the phone for about 20 minutes, we had a great conversation. We didn't just talked shop, she told me how her divorce was final. We talked about my son and her son. Anyway I ended the call after 20 minutes because I felt like it was going well but I didn't want to jinx it, plus I'm a bit of a coward lol.

 

I'm not good on picking up singles from woman but I think she is interested in me. Back when I was training her she once told our receptionist something that led her to believe that she had a small crush on me, or so she said.

 

I would like to ask her out again but I'm not sure if I should. I don't want to be the guy who asks her out each time we talk. On the other hand we have a lot in common and I really like her. What would you do?

Posted

Some women need more time than others to heal after a divorce that is why it really all depends on the woman herself. I'd say ask her. Start off casually talking to her, and allow her to first trust you as a friend. Then once you develop a friendship, she will feel more comfortable doing something a little more romantic with you.

Posted

You asked her out inappropriately before her divorce. With that being said, she knows you are interested. She probably flaked because it didn't feel right. I would say the ball is in her court. Don't ask her out again. If she is ready to date and is interested in you, she will do the initiating - or you will wait for her to do so. I wouldn't be so eager just because you like her. Better to give her some time and let her decide when she is ready.

Posted

I must admit I don't really know what to do. She is the only person I have asked out since my divorce 2 years ago and since we never did go out and after my wife of 16 years of marriage cheated on me my self confidence is nil. People have been saying to take it slow so tomorrow I thought I would email her. She had asked my advice regarding her son becoming a personal trainer and I gave her a quick recommendation. I thought that I would give her a few other recommendations while also mentioning how nice it was to talk with her. She really did put my mind at ease regarding some decisions I had made and that would be it. I'll just see how that go's. Do's that sound good or am I being to wimpy?

Posted
I must admit I don't really know what to do. She is the only person I have asked out since my divorce 2 years ago and since we never did go out and after my wife of 16 years of marriage cheated on me my self confidence is nil. People have been saying to take it slow so tomorrow I thought I would email her. She had asked my advice regarding her son becoming a personal trainer and I gave her a quick recommendation. I thought that I would give her a few other recommendations while also mentioning how nice it was to talk with her. She really did put my mind at ease regarding some decisions I had made and that would be it. I'll just see how that go's. Do's that sound good or am I being to wimpy?

 

OK I didn't email her Friday instead I took the weekend to think about it. I decided to go ahead and do it. I figure that if I email her and ask her to coffee that way I willn't be putting her on the spot. What do you think? It's either this or a phone call.

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