Need help with this

[Jonesey0]

Hi.

 

Really need help with a question. I was with my ex for 14 years, so i had a really close relationship with her parents and brothers. They were my second family, really.

They all congratulated me on my birthday this year, after we broke up.

 

I'm in NC with my ex for almost 3 months now.

 

Should i still wish them happy birthday? I really have strong feelings towards them, and i think it's rude not to.

 

HELP!

[DoF]

I would, but only if you feel that it won't cause you to reset your healing or effect your healing.

 

Seems like you are WELL on the way to completely getting over that relationship and in a good position. Why not?

 

I would not recommend reaching out to HER though, EVER again.

[Man with Dog]

I would, but only if you feel that it won't cause you to reset your healing or effect your healing.

 

Seems like you are WELL on the way to completely getting over that relationship and in a good position. Why not?

 

I would not recommend reaching out to HER though, EVER again.

 

I agree 100% with this.

[Jonesey0]

It won't affect me at all. It is the right thing to do, and i really wish her family well. A simple text is ok.

It's was not their decision, it was her's. And they all were great to me throghout all those years.

Reaching out to her is out of question. I never even responded to her text a month ago.

[Clinton]

I wouldn't. Sometimes as much as we like people, we have to let them go to make a healthier life for ourselves.

 

After my divorce I cut contact with my wife's family. I loved them very much but it was just a connection that kept the wound open.

 

You're three months NC after a 14 year relationship. I think you're kidding yourself about your motives for staying in touch with her family.

[DoF]

It won't affect me at all. It is the right thing to do, and i really wish her family well. A simple text is ok.

It's was not their decision, it was her's. And they all were great to me throghout all those years.

Reaching out to her is out of question. I never even responded to her text a month ago.

 

Smart man, smart man. Keep up the great work!

 

Watch them closely if they reply, she might be trying to get THEM to pull you back in (or they might even want you to be back into her life themselves). So just apply "everyone deserves a 2nd chance, but not 3rd" rule.

 

If they do it once, ask them to not do that. 2nd time, cut off.

 

 

[Jonesey0]

I wouldn't. Sometimes as much as we like people, we have to let them go to make a healthier life for ourselves.

 

After my divorce I cut contact with my wife's family. I loved them very much but it was just a connection that kept the wound open.

 

You're three months NC after a 14 year relationship. I think you're kidding yourself about your motives for staying in touch with her family.

 

They are not a part of my life anymore, and i'm well aware of that.

But they were a huge part of my life for so many years, and i have no reason at all to be rude and disregard them, if they haven't done that to me.

Theres no hidden motive here Clinton. Just being polite. If i wanted to stay in touch with her, i would have responded to her when she reached out.

I don't want to be in touch with her, don't want to be her friend.

I wanted a relationship with her. Nowadays, i sincerely dont know if i even want that anymore.

[Movingforward3]

It is hard on this part. My ex kept in contact with my family after we divorced and I wasn't happy about it. I tolerated it as I knew she was close to my siblings. I did not keep in contact with her's. So, make sure you have strong reason to contact them that has nothing to do with your ex. Keep your feelings about the break up to yourself and ensure she isn't around as best as possible.

[Dottieflanogon]

I wouldn't even bother....I'm sure her parents does not expect their daughter's ex to wish them a happy b day. if you do that, They will tell her and they will both think you are just trying to get back on your exes radar. seriously, it's very transparent. don't do it.