is this relationship salvagable?

[jbrown1809]

Hi guys, so I'm new on here but really could use some advice. I met my now ex through a mutual friend- he had just gotten out of a long term relationship a few months prior to me meeting him (i guess that shouldve been a red flag). We started casually hanging out but it quickly developed into something more serious (i was with him 6-7 days a week.) We are AMAZING when we're getting along, hysterical laughing, super affectionate, all thay stuff. Unfortunately we keep getting into fights...a lot of it i feel like was alcohol fueled...i recently stopped drinking and the fighting continued. On Wednesday we got into a fight and instead of giving him space to cool off i basically smothered him until he told me that he wasn't happy and the fighting is too much. To make it worse- looking back i knew he was already stressed about money and his mom being sick and i know fighting with me was the last thing he needed. During this conversation At first he was acting like he was breaking up with me but then tried to switch it to maybe we need space to work on ourselves. I felt like this was just a nice way for him to try to end things so i just said no...if you don't want to be with me anymore than thats that. I then made the biggest mistake ever and basically blew up his phone with pathetic voicemails and calls the entire day. Thursday morning i came to my senses and emailed him apologizing and saying i respect his decision and i agree i need to work on myself and the fighting isnt healthy or fair to either of us. He emailed me back suprisingly saying thank you for being mature and understanding-that he cares about me immensely and wishes me the best but thinks we need to work on ourselves and take time to think about things. Im scared that this was just his way of letting me down easy =( normally i wouldn't care and it would be easy for me to get over someone but i felt like we had this amazing..almost magnetic connection and we were able to be so comfortable with eachother =( i know he felt it too but im scared i pushed him too far with all the fighting and crazy calling/texting. I havent tried to contact him at all since Thursday but i miss him so much =( Do you guys think it's done for good and i just need to move on or is there a chance of salvaging things once a little time has passed for us to both calm down?

[Liefde]

I would say give it some time and do work on yourself in this time, try to find ways to resolve problems more amenably.

There is some big arguments in most relationships one should not sink it if both parties can see there way open to forgive and work on it.

[Movingforward3]

Give it some time, say a couple weeks and try to contact to see how things are and chat.

[jbrown1809]

Thank you so much for your advice =) i think it is just the constant fighting that he is sic of and i agree its unhealthy. I think i just need to give him some time and space and work on myself like you said. It would be so much easier to just move on if we didnt get along so great when we weren't fighting =(

[Dottieflanogon]

I would have to say no, It sounds like you two are just incompatible. In a way .having disagreements is normal to an extend. Communication is key to every relationship. Pretty much open up to each other. Arguments start because there is a misunderstanding of each others ideals and thought processes .All that said and done, It sounds like he's just making an excuse to get out of the relationship, he probably fell out of love.

You'd be surprised that you can find a lot better out there who will not just run away from problems but work through them with you.

[jbrown1809]

Makes me so sad because i hate that i miss him so much...but you might be right =(