I'm a virgin, she's not, help?

[Algebruh]

So my girlfriend and I have been dating for 3-4 months, she's all I need and much, much more, a truly amazing girl, I admire her beauty and the way she does her.

 

As hard as I try to look past the fact she is not a virgin, I always come to a halt on getting serious or giving her the "V card" I feel so selfish and stupid.

 

I always apologise to her because I simply don't have a proper explanation on why I feel this way. I've refused to have sex with a decent amount of girls..(inb4 people saying "y da u lying") because I have such high standard...Was I a for doing this?

 

Idk why I feel so hurt by this and I'm sorry if I made you puke and cringe on how awful I am

[Fudgie]

I don't think you are being stupid. The only time I find this stupid is when someone is not a virgin, and yet judges their partner for not being a virgin. That's hypocrisy.

 

But you're a virgin, and if you want to date another virgin, hey, that's fine. Just be aware that you may be looking for a while because unless you're religious, virgin women are hard to come by past a certain age.

 

I think if this is a true sticking issue, you need to be honest with yourself and stop the relationship. If you cannot get past it, then you cannot. No sense forcing yourself to stay out of an obligatory feeling. You and her both deserve better.

[somechick99]

Your feelings about not wanting to give it up for the first time to a non-virgin are understandable and nothing to beat yourself up over. However, you knew what you got into from the beginning. She's not a virgin and can't reverse the past, period. By making her feel guilty or rejecting her because of it, you're being unfair to her. Either deal with her past or don't, but either quit whining to her or quit wasting her time.

[Dottieflanogon]

Sexual activity between consenting adults is human nature, and perfectly normal and acceptable. Not everyone feels that they have to "save themselves" for a certain person, and there's nothing wrong with it if they don't. It doesn't have to come up at all if you don't want it to. let her past be her past, and move forward with her into the future. You should not be upset about it, and you can make it stop if you choose to. if you can't get over it, you need to breakup with her, because you can't accept her unconditionally, and that's what's required for a happy relationship

[Ms Darcy]

If you only want to have sex with another virgin, then you need to end the relationship with your gf immediately and stop wasting her time.

[missmarple]

You're being narrow-minded. When you've slept with a few girls, you'll realise how stupid it is to consider virginity anything more than just a physical condition. But, by then, your 'amazing' gf will be history.