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Letter to ex friend?


question2015

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A friend and I had a disagreement about 6 months ago and we no longer speak to each other. I said some insensitive comments during the disagreement and would like to apologize through a letter. This friendship "breakup" has really affected me and it is causing major emotional stress in my life because I miss my friend dearly and I don t have many others. However, I don't want to be friends again. But I feel apologizing would help me move on and help me stop obsessing over this situation. It's on my mind everyday. I realize by sending the letter, I probably won't get a response back but I'm ok with that. Would sending the letter be a lost cause if I don't want to be friends anymore anyway?

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I think if you're truly remorseful and you have no ulterior motive, then it's fine to send an apology letter to someone that you feel you've wronged.

 

If you're going to reject their friendship if your apology makes them want to communicate again, then sending the letter is kind of a mind job and I'd recommend you don't.

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I think if you send the letter, you'll feel worse. You'll expect a response even if you don't think you will and you'll wait for one and you'll still be thinking about it.

 

I think you'd be better off writing a letter, as the others have suggested, and not sending it.

 

In fact, instead of posting the letter, you might consider posting the draft letter on eNA (but remember to be anonymise the details) and getting feedback from the community. It might help you to stop accepting all/most of the blame for what happened.

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