friendoffriend Posted September 28, 2015 Share Posted September 28, 2015 okay so i just found out that my close friend has been dealing with his ex girl for almost a year now. They only talked for 2 weeks but after that she would call him and tell him that she needs him and if he wont help her and be with her then shed kill herself. Out of sheer terror and guilt he kept in contact with her. one day he had his phone off and because he didnt talk to her that day so she actually attempted suicide and ended up in the hospital. After that night he keeps his phone on loud and comes to her reacue whenever she needs. He is only 17 and he cries to me every night because he doesnt want to be with her or talk to her anymore but he is scared of her trying to hurt herself. What can he do? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boltnrun Posted September 28, 2015 Share Posted September 28, 2015 Tell her parents. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
friendoffriend Posted September 28, 2015 Author Share Posted September 28, 2015 he doesnt know any of their information and he cant ask the girl for it. Like i said he only personally talked to her for 2 weeks and now all the convos are around him trying to make sure she doesnt hurt herself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SooSad33 Posted September 28, 2015 Share Posted September 28, 2015 he can NOT 'help her'. She needs professional help. Maybe to be put away in hospital for a bit and get onto some med's.. like anti depressents. Yes, break ups can be painful but this is not fair on him! Poor guy. He needs to understand this. He can;t be her sitter and as mentioned, her parents need to know what's going on here. Eventually, HE may need some prof help too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alli Posted September 28, 2015 Share Posted September 28, 2015 Generally when people threaten suicide if a partner wants to leave, it's a manipulation attempt to force that other person to stay in their life. It is interesting that the girl actually attempted suicide when he didn't answer his phone for one day. Doesn't that sound like she is trying to control him? She has so little regard for her own life that she would end it because one day he didn't answer his phone? No, she definitely taught him a lesson this time. As you can see, his reaction is to never let his phone leave his side now. I think she is doing a very good job of controlling him. At the same time, you can't be too mentally stable to actually risk your life in order to control someone. Then again, I guess mentally stable people don't threaten it in the first place. If I were him I would tell the police and the hospital staff that she threatens suicide numerous times and that she attempted suicide when he didn't answer his phone once. If she threatens to attempt it again, I would call the police that very moment and tell them where to find her. Is she actually out of the hospital now? I doubt they would let her go right away unless they felt fairly certain that she wouldn't immediately try it again. Really, she needs a thorough evaluation to determine if she needs to remain hospitalized. It's hard when someone is making you feel responsible for their life but he can only be manipulated to the extent that he allows. He needs to tell his parents or a guidance counselor at school what is going on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boltnrun Posted September 28, 2015 Share Posted September 28, 2015 Then he needs to tell his parents. They can contact the proper school authorities, who can then tell her parents. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
musicman777 Posted September 28, 2015 Share Posted September 28, 2015 OP, like everyone else said, your friend needs to tell her parents. Either tell his own parents or tell hers. He cannot be burdened with a girls life. He has every right to break up with someone if he doesn't want to be with them anymore. She obviously has mental problems and needs help if she is trying to kill herself over a teenage break up. Good luck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
notalady Posted September 28, 2015 Share Posted September 28, 2015 I won't repeat what everyone else already said. Just want to clarify, am I correct to understand that your friend has not even met with this girl in person since about a year ago? Have they ever met, as you said they "only talked for 2 weeks"? Did he go to the hospital when she attempted suicide? As in, did he see it in person, or did she just tell him that? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SoulTaker Posted September 28, 2015 Share Posted September 28, 2015 I won't repeat what everyone else already said. Just want to clarify, am I correct to understand that your friend has not even met with this girl in person since about a year ago? Have they ever met, as you said they "only talked for 2 weeks"? Did he go to the hospital when she attempted suicide? As in, did he see it in person, or did she just tell him that? That's a great point. How did he know she was in the hospital? Did someone else tell him, or did she call from the hospital room (easy to confirm)? Also, if you're a "close friend" as you've stated, then why don't you tell his parents. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dottieflanogon Posted September 28, 2015 Share Posted September 28, 2015 I think the best way to handle this is tell a professional handle this. If you have a guidance councilor at your school then maybe your friend can go to them about this issue .He would be doing the right thing by letting the right people handle this situation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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