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Shyruby

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I have been with my boyfriend for 8 years now and we are still not married or even engaged. I'm just wondering if its ever going to have? It feels like he will only marry me if he gets his parents approval. And I know they don't like me because I don't come from the best of family even though I'm nothing like them. It just hurts because I want to have that day. I just wonder if he wants to spend the rest of our life together. I love him so much I don't know what to do.

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you shouldn't marry a guy who is more interested in what his family thinks than what you think. even if you marry him, he's gonna side with his family for future decisions.... like which family to be with for christmas etc. you will be happier to marry a man who considers you to be #1 in his life and everybody else comes after. i have a feeling the guy you're with is also going to love the child you have with him MORE than he loves you. that's not right. even if you have kids, he needs to love YOU MORE than them.

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Possibly the worst reason ever to get married.

 

 

Oh, that is so true. "That day" is over in less than the blink of an eye. If I had to do it over again, I would have had a quick civil ceremony and had all my pictures taken the day before. Then the entire wedding day would have been about celebrating with family, friends, and my new husband at a much longer reception.

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you shouldn't marry a guy who is more interested in what his family thinks than what you think. even if you marry him, he's gonna side with his family for future decisions.... like which family to be with for christmas etc. you will be happier to marry a man who considers you to be #1 in his life and everybody else comes after. i have a feeling the guy you're with is also going to love the child you have with him MORE than he loves you. that's not right. even if you have kids, he needs to love YOU MORE than them.

 

My wife and I always put our daughter first when she was young. Nothing wrong with that.

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If he hasn't asked after eight years...he doesn't want to, and he's not going to. Even if you did manage to "talk him into" (IE force him) agreeing to it, is that the kind of marriage you want to be a part of? Let this one go, move on, and find someone better before you find yourself middle aged and miserable because you wasted 10..15..20 years on someone who doesn't truly love you (because he doesn't). And by the way no one should be judging your family background as a way of determining your worth as a partner or person. Why would you want to be a part of a family that treats you like that? He sucks, his family sucks, I'm sorry. You deserve better.

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I can only speak for the UK but what puts LOADS of couples off marriage is the sheer cost of it all. It's sort of expected that stag and hen dos have to be for at least a weekend and out of the country. It's one reason even quite religious couples live together and have kids before marriage.

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