Real life soap opera

[Jw2015]

I met my now ex gf/fiancée 3 years ago in university in The southern US, It was love at first sight and a real fast connection between us, we started dating in June 2012 and were together almost every day for the next two years. after we finished university we went traveling in the western US for the summer of 2013, when we got back to US we had discussed studying abroad and since I wasn't from the US I had expressed wanting to raise a family there. We went to my country of origin to look at masters programs in November-December 2013. When we got back her father talked to me about getting a ring, I did not feel it was the right time because she had expressed that she could not live away from her mother or leave the US. This was a bit concerning to me but we moved in together in early 2014 and were very happy, every once in a very little while she would hint at getting engaged but it was very signally and not deep expressions. I know now she was waiting for a proposal that whole time. We were accepted into University for our masters program and I said if its ok to wait how the year abroad would go, so she told me either we get engaged before we go or after the study program, because she takes her studies very seriously and did not want to get engaged while in an intense master program. I said ok knowing that we would go through the year and eventually get engage, and work it out. Because I couldn't commit to her at the time she decided to move in with a male roommate and I was going to live with my parents( the towns are 20 min between each other) I was not happy but I told her I respect your decision and I am not going anywhere. I was at her apartment every week and most weekends so I practically lived there. we were not the perfect couple, we would fight occasionally, but not more than the average couple, there was a bit of a rift between her and my family but we worked it out even though it was hard, and she can be a very difficult person but I handled her and made it work. During most of the year she expressed to me that she liked it here but still could not leave her mother (because she is not a well woman) and could not leave the US. I told her we would work it out as long as we were together. As the year went by, me having few friends here due to the many years iv spent in the US, we would hang out mostly us but once a week my good friend who I know since I was 9 years old and his friend would come and chill with us. She went home for spring break in March expressing her love and missing me and all declaring the whole year and time that I was her ONE as well as while she was away. When she came back I said that the year is almost up and so is the program and so its finally time to get engaged, about 2 months shy of our 3 year anniversary. she agreed and I was blissfully happy, but a bout a week and a half after that she called me to break up! Out of no where, stating that I didn't make her a priority throughout the relationship and that her love had deteriorated without her noticing, only when she was home, I tried to get back together with her but her mind was made up and she's as stubborn as a mule she also stated that she decided that she loves it here and that she wants to live here. needless to say I was devastated but the worst was ahead, after about 1.6 months of breaking up, she got engaged to my good friend/ childhood friend who used to hand out with us every week! betrayal! I felt as if two knifes we inserted one in the back one in the heart and twisting it in. There was obvious cheating and stuff at one point during the year but also I suspect that he fed her lies about me and tricked her. This was a major shocker to everyone who knew us and the families involved which created a major rift and anger. they are set to wed in December of this year, its been 4 months more or less since the break up and two months since they got engaged. now I really don't know if there is much advise y'all can give me because I'v heard it all, I just want to hear some thoughts and insight to this situation, any feedback works.

[Dottieflanogon]

Being dumped for someone else is a double punch, not only do you feel abandoned but also replaced. This relationship was not for you, the only thing you need to realize that the fact she broke up with you.

 

It sounds like she emotionally checked out of the relationship way before ending things with you, obviously she was already seeing your friend behind your back.

 

I don't think there was anything you could have done differently, it just wasn't meant to be.It would be painful for a while but the pain will slowly subside and your life will go on

 

The thing you really need to keep telling yourself -and this true-is that you deserve someone better.Work on yourself, learn new things and do things you enjoy. The best revenge is to live well.

 

Hang in there. I know you're hurting, it does get better

 

P:S Try to break down your post into paragraphs, it is much easier on the eyes and you'll get more response.It was little taugh to get through.