silversoul Posted August 23, 2015 Share Posted August 23, 2015 So, in late June I got a call from a relative's relative asking if they can introduce me to a great guy who's looking for a long term partner. I said yes, and the same day I got a message from this guy, let's call him G., we texted back and forth and he asked if we could meet the next day, as he's leaving soon (he resides in a different country). I said yes and we had an hour long date laughing and talking a lot, he seemed really interested and messaged me after an hour after the date saying smth like 'Think I'll never forget you'. The messaging continued after he went back to his country. Then there was a break and we continued messaging steadily from that point without any breaks, there are like 3 messages per day in average. During late July we were really hitting it off, it seems, exchanging stories and pictures, and I was really enjoying talking to him and there was some flirting as well. Now it has been a week and I feel like either he's busy or he's losing interest, which is pretty painful cause I thought we were getting along pretty well. I can't think of any reason he lost interest than he met someone he likes more, or he just realized I'm not good enough for him (he earns much more than me, mainly because he lives in a country which makes it possible). This is especially disappointing since his relatives seem to very much like me, we are originally from the same small place and everyone knows each other. His aunt bumped into my mum and was asking about me. Meanwhile either he's really busy or slowly letting me down. What's your thoughts? How should I proceed? He still messages me, but very short texts now and with longer breaks, I'm afraid he might stop talking to me anyday now. Am I imagining things and should just relax and wait or should I just let go? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tinydance Posted August 23, 2015 Share Posted August 23, 2015 Well, I think the bigger question here is though, what was the plan from the start? Like, is he coming back to where you live or...? Or is he planning to stay in the other country indefinitely? If he doesn't really have any definite plans to return, he may just be losing interest because he's realised that a relationship isn't going to work unless you're together in person. If he was going to come back, I still don't think there is that much you can do on your end apart from just keep replying to his messages when he does message and wait and see if he will ask you out again when he returns. However, I would not just be "putting all eggs in one basket" with this guy. I don't think you can really expect too much from him because in person you had met only once and the date was pretty short, and nothing actually happened. Like, he didn't ask you out on another date or anything like that...So technically he is not obliged to be dating only you, or to be dating you at all, since he hardly knows you. I would say keep dating other guys, but if you like him, just keep talking to him too and see what happens when he comes back. But don't get too invested because you really don't know how things will go, you don't know him much yet and he doesn't know you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThatwasThen Posted August 23, 2015 Share Posted August 23, 2015 You live in different countries. Just let it fade and get out there and mingle so that you find someone where you live that can nurture a relationship with you in real life. There I no sense in you trying to keep this going romantically and he Is more likely then not thinking the very same thing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Helpexpressme Posted August 23, 2015 Share Posted August 23, 2015 It won't work because you live in different countries. For a relationship to be successful in the long run, you need to spend time with each other in person. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SoulTaker Posted August 23, 2015 Share Posted August 23, 2015 There's nothing there. Let it go. What you should be asking yourself is, why did a relative connect you with a person who lives in another country? What was their motive? Nobody in their right mind should set someone up with a foreigner, unless it was for someone else's benefit, and not yours. Just because they're a relative, doesn't mean that they're looking out for what's best for you. And they probably didn't do it with a "relationship" as the objective. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
silversoul Posted August 26, 2015 Author Share Posted August 26, 2015 You are right, I'll follow your advice and wait and reply when messages me. As you said, we only saw each other once, so there are no obligations. Going on a different date tomorrow, helps me to distract from this and not feel stressed about this guy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LuvAlways Posted August 27, 2015 Share Posted August 27, 2015 Definitely see other people! Enjoy your time, but I'm not 100% on board with letting G fizzle out. Stay friends, keep up with you're messages though there may not be three per day. Who knew, maybe you end up moving to his country, or he moves home..... Crazier things have happened! LuvAlways link removed Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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