Being called a

[DNdx3]

Me and my boyfriend have been on and off for 7 years, officially together for 3. He had a kid when we were "off" and I have raised him since he was 6 months. We then had a baby of our own who is everything to me. We moved into a house and have been through ups and downs along the way. When we first started dating he was a partyer and got a dui and became sober. For my entire pregnancy and a bit after he didn't drink at all. Then he slowly started drinking beers and now liquor again. Anyways, in December, when I thought all was well.. He was behind my back talking to 3 different girls. For me, cheating is usually the #1 thing that I will break up with someone so fast for. No, it wasn't physical ever (from what I know), but it sure as hell was emotional. As well as he would talk about me negatively to these girls. I broke up with him, and became extremely depressed. We ended up back together (after somehow me asking for him back) because he twists literally everything around to be my fault. Ever since that whole situation, I have never been able to put my mind at ease or trust him; which you would think I'd just break up w/ him but it's so hard when you have a family. A few months ago he got drunk and called me a "in " and I flipped and was done. Then he apologized the next day and I forgave him barely, but said if he ever called me that again I would be so done. Now, tonight, after he has broken up with me 5 times in the past 2 days, but then saying never mind, he went out with his work friends, withdrew money instead of using his card, said he was going certain places like Applebee's and a pool bar place, and I just don't understand. I have asked him for us to have a quality time date, and he said no bc we're "broke" yet he took out over $100 tonight. Makes me feel like . He became extremely drunk, changed where he said he was 3 times within a phone call that lasted 2 mins, and said " you I'm done" and twisted it around to somehow I did something. So now I'm stuck. Because I baul my eyes out not wanting to break up but know I need to because this is EXHAUSTING. Please please please somebody give me advice. Because i love him, so much. But he has treated me with such disrespect that I feel like I need to let go but it's so hard for me

[pippy longstocking]

The trouble with love is ....we put up with so much crap because we are in love ..we make excuses , we give second/ third/ fourth and so on , chances ..because what is the alternative ...that horrible desperate lonely grief right ? We have all done it and some continue to do it in the name of love . But for the person we keep giving chances to they take this as the green flag to continue because they suspect they will be forgiven or they simply dont care . The more we put up with , the more they do and the more down trodden we become ..Where is the respect ..we clearly dont respect ourselves or we wouldnt put up with it ..and they respect us less and less ...I say all this with a life time of "putting up " with crap behind me .

 

Staying with your man wont stop your heartbreak , it wont change him and it wont make him see what he is losing ..it will simply give him the go ahead to carry on doing what he is doing and all the while you are simply falling apart .

 

You have to muster up the strength from within to walk away ..to stand up for yourself , to keep your self respect and to never let him or any one else trample all over you like you mean nothing .

 

You could sit him down one last time and lay your cards out on the table ..I suspect he wont think you mean it or will manage to turn it on its head and leave you sat there wondering how the hell it became all your fault again or you can end it now . Either way darling , life is short and you dont want to look back and realise how many years you wasted been hurt and disrespected and children see all this and pick up on it all ..for you ..for them ..make that step to change your life . x

[agent1607307371]

Waht you need to do is hard, but imagine how much harder another six months like this will be.