IAmFCA Posted January 21, 2016 Author Share Posted January 21, 2016 I sent info to my bestie re new guy, and she said, He doesn't look like your type. And she is right. He is not my type. I think our values are out of sync as well. We had fun talking on the phone, and i am going to give it an honest shot on Sunday. Link to comment
IAmFCA Posted January 21, 2016 Author Share Posted January 21, 2016 I love my city. But now I really don't want to go on this date on sunday. Add this to the list of Batya's, interesting people itic knows... Can't say why, unfortunately. Sigh. Here is the relevant question: he bought tickets, great seats. Can I back out? If so, how? Link to comment
Batya33 Posted January 21, 2016 Share Posted January 21, 2016 Definitely one more chance, go and pay for half if you're ultimately not interested. Link to comment
WithLove Posted January 21, 2016 Share Posted January 21, 2016 I'd go, and if it's not for you, offer to pay for your ticket. Link to comment
IAmFCA Posted January 21, 2016 Author Share Posted January 21, 2016 His business associates have been associated with white collar crime... not threatening or anything. I know I won't take it further. I talked to a friend in same industry which helped me dig a little deeper on the all knowing google. Link to comment
IAmFCA Posted January 21, 2016 Author Share Posted January 21, 2016 I just broke the date. I just can't do it. Link to comment
WithLove Posted January 21, 2016 Share Posted January 21, 2016 Meh, if you don't want to, don't force it. Nothing lost, really. Link to comment
IAmFCA Posted January 21, 2016 Author Share Posted January 21, 2016 Meh, if you don't want to, don't force it. Nothing lost, really. If I liked him, it would have been a great date. But once I learned more, it was like Ewww Gross. Can't get past that! Link to comment
WithLove Posted January 21, 2016 Share Posted January 21, 2016 Yeah, no point in trying to force it. If you didn't like him just on principal, no amount of dates would change that. Next! Link to comment
IAmFCA Posted January 21, 2016 Author Share Posted January 21, 2016 Yeah, no point in trying to force it. If you didn't like him just on principal, no amount of dates would change that. Next! Oh my goodness I am getting full court press now. Sheesh, just give it up! NEXT! Link to comment
IAmFCA Posted January 22, 2016 Author Share Posted January 22, 2016 This Slushie thing is feeling like a good thing. I mean, it's rather silly. Two people with other obligations live within 5 miles of one another, and text more than anything. It's the slowest courtship ever, and that is making it sort of sweet. Link to comment
IAmFCA Posted January 22, 2016 Author Share Posted January 22, 2016 Annoying to be kidless and he is kid-ful... and both of us feeling the same impulse of what to do next but not available to do it... Link to comment
IAmFCA Posted January 23, 2016 Author Share Posted January 23, 2016 Sigh. Glad to be alone, while missing attention. Similar feeling as the other day. Of course, I got lots of it from someone else, earlier, and shut it down. I requested attention from slushi and got it immediately. Want more. The curse of being such an extrovert; I use people for energy, like zombies do. And tonight, the whole world here is tucked away, waiting to see what tonight brings. I wonder what has inspired my sweet tooth of late? Link to comment
IAmFCA Posted January 23, 2016 Author Share Posted January 23, 2016 It is beautiful outside. Time to make this a beautiful day! Link to comment
IAmFCA Posted January 23, 2016 Author Share Posted January 23, 2016 Sigh... more candidates on deck. One who has messaged, so I guess he's next up for a meet and greet. I question his stability though. More peripatetic than I am. Clearly smart and enterprising and fit... he gets a shot. Read an article today about dating a single father with primary custody. Yup, it fits. Late nights are easier to arrange than proper dates; view them as respectful of the kids, it said. Be prepared to go slower than slow, it said. Know that there is a long due diligence period BEFORE dating to determine suitability. Yup, that fits too. I am used to being the one who has kids all week, and being the only one on call for activities and the like. Slushie keeps himself available all the time, like an open door policy, plus supports sports and travel. He would make a boundary to support a dating life, I know, and he has obliquely referred to the fact that he isn't ready to support that. So, off to more first meets I will go. Maybe the next round will be free of near-felons, cling-ons, and negative nelsons. Fingers crossed! Link to comment
IAmFCA Posted January 23, 2016 Author Share Posted January 23, 2016 Friend may have to go to war zone for work. Fingers crossed. Link to comment
IAmFCA Posted January 23, 2016 Author Share Posted January 23, 2016 Hmm. One of my OKC rejects says, let's be friends first, date slowly. Same as Slushie. I am going to play it out. That's a good reflection on the vibe I'm giving out. People who are serious are requesting an opportunity to get to know me. Nice. Link to comment
IAmFCA Posted January 24, 2016 Author Share Posted January 24, 2016 Woke thinking of cars. But I don't need one! It's a depreciating asset! Appreciate! Link to comment
IAmFCA Posted January 24, 2016 Author Share Posted January 24, 2016 Slushie has been snowed in with kids, and hasn't called or texted since Friday. He reaches out with purpose, he knows I'm here, he has nothing to achieve and so therefore no reason to reach out. I prefer more of a consistent touch, but then, I am accustomed to constant touch since, well, birth. At the same time, my family doesn't communicate much either.... I know they are there, so why would i? Lol, methinks there are some lessons here. Link to comment
IAmFCA Posted January 24, 2016 Author Share Posted January 24, 2016 Heard from my bestie. Link to comment
IAmFCA Posted January 24, 2016 Author Share Posted January 24, 2016 Slushie checked in. I suggested a walk. He's completely socked in. Can't even get out to any main streets, even walking, he says. Reached out to me just to say hi, with no purpose whatsoever. Link to comment
IAmFCA Posted January 25, 2016 Author Share Posted January 25, 2016 Sweet to hear from wingman Any man who is lucky enough to have you is... lucky. Yes. True. So, I keep at it. Had nice conversations with CarGuy (a new nickname). I really like his personality but have concerns about his emotional make up. Agreed to a meal and a visit to a place of mutual interest, somewhere he's not been. CarGuy said at first meet, I don't know how to date multiple... a couple of men have said that, without pausing to see what I think of it. Of course I have no intention of dating only one. I realize, they call it friends to take the physical off the table. It's still dating, it's just semantics. So, two messages exchanged on the site, no plans. One second date on deck in concept; no plans. Slushie, tomorrow, weather permitting. Let's be honest here, I like this guy. We have been in contact now for 7 months. We have refused to break, at several points where we could have easily let the other go, or let ourselves go. But we didn't, and now there is a certain trust developing, and a certain charm. I have to put those feelings aside, and remain open to others. Slushie hasn't made any move to claim me nor limit his options. We remain affectionate and platonic. It's early yet. Link to comment
Batya33 Posted January 25, 2016 Share Posted January 25, 2016 "several points where we could have easily let the other go, or let ourselves go." That you could let each other go suggests that you had something to let go. Would you say the same about a friendly acquaintance who faded in and out. It doesn't seem to me there was any "refusal to break" which implies a decision because there was never any initial decision to be together as a couple. I have friends I see casually from time to time -they pop up, then fade out, rinse, repeat. I am suggesting this because I don't think elevating this to that kind of interaction is productive for you if you want to continue being open to meeting people. Then it frames it as if you two are strongly connected, but have challenges, and you're refusing to let the challenges break the strong connection. But then you need a strong connection -and at least close to some kind of a commitment in the first place, IMO. Link to comment
WithLove Posted January 25, 2016 Share Posted January 25, 2016 Hmm. One of my OKC rejects says, let's be friends first, date slowly. Same as Slushie. I am going to play it out. That's a good reflection on the vibe I'm giving out. People who are serious are requesting an opportunity to get to know me. Nice. He's a reject for a reason. Why are contemplating him? Link to comment
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