Dougie_D Posted April 14, 2015 Share Posted April 14, 2015 If I lost 20-30 lbs, bulked up, would I be "hot"? Or would I still be an "old man" to women? What if I get my body looking great, but I still can't find women to be attracted to me? Are there men who have really good bodies in the mid-30's and still can't get women? Why would they not be able too? Are women who are close to our ages not care about a man's body then? I've decided to let go of my feelings on fighting against my fathers' wishes and do it for a different cause. Link to comment
Willywagtail Posted April 14, 2015 Share Posted April 14, 2015 I don't know. It depends what sort of brain went with the supposedly hot body. Thats what the real issue is - what's your personality like? Who are you as a person? How do you express youself in the world? Do you actually like women or just expect them to be attracted to your hot body? Are you a dud in bed? (your hot body won't count for much then). Do you know how to talk to women like human beings and not just stare at their boobs? (A hot body won't get you far if you do that) Link to comment
missmarple Posted April 14, 2015 Share Posted April 14, 2015 It depends on the age of the woman. I imagine that to a 20yo girl, for example, 'hot' is someone closer to her age. But to a woman in her '30s, sure, you could be considered hot. However, keep in mind, that it's not just about a good body. I've met many guys with great bodies who I wouldn't call hot..or be interested in them in any way. Link to comment
brodus Posted April 14, 2015 Share Posted April 14, 2015 Women are attracted to confident men. Period. Age has little to do with it, in my experience. Women are much less concerned with body stuff (within reason) than men. A good sense of humor and a unique personality is better than bigger arms. Unless you want to get a shallow, young girl. I married a 23yr old woman when I was 30. I'm now divorced, 39 and have been seeing a 24yr old, a 27yr old, and a 34yr old. I'm not overweight, but I'm not my college buff self. Women want confident, smart, funny men who have their $hit together and treat them with respect. A strapping body is simply icing on the cake. Bake the cake first. Link to comment
agent1607307371 Posted April 14, 2015 Share Posted April 14, 2015 It's never too late to work on your body Dougie, but having a "hot" body doesn't mean that you will suddenly have hoardes of women drooling over you. Link to comment
lerenard Posted April 14, 2015 Share Posted April 14, 2015 I am 25, and I had both "hot body" guys and "normal looking" guys after me. My boyfriend now has an average body, and honestly I would never date the bodybuilder type of guy. I am petite and quite thin, muscles and veins all over the body wont turn me on. I like being toned myself, but no crazy "bulking up". Agree, its not about the body at all in the end, but working out is never a bad thing, right? You can meet women in your gym! Link to comment
debrajulia1966 Posted April 14, 2015 Share Posted April 14, 2015 It is NOT all about the body, a great personality, a loving and caring attitude, listening skills, respect and many more aspects make the person who they are. Focus on those things because that's the best afrodisiac there is. Link to comment
Clinton Posted April 14, 2015 Share Posted April 14, 2015 Really?!?!? Mid 30's is too old? Some one better tell George Clooney or Brad Pitt that they aren't hot anymore or attractive to the opposite sex. Link to comment
greta96 Posted April 14, 2015 Share Posted April 14, 2015 LOL no, it is definitely NOT too old, I know and see hot guys out there who are in their 40s and even 50s! Do it for yourself, first and foremost. Having a good looking body will give you the boost of confidence you need, and once you have that confidence, everything else will fall into place. It is not a guarantee that you'll have women all over you, but it will majorly increase your odds. Especially because of the increased confidence you'll have. Link to comment
goddess Posted April 14, 2015 Share Posted April 14, 2015 Really?!?!? Mid 30's is too old? Some one better tell George Clooney or Brad Pitt that they aren't hot anymore or attractive to the opposite sex. Great response, Clinton! How right you are. I also agree that it's never too late to work on your body but I must say that it takes more than that. Debrajulia1966 said it perfectly. Now, get going to the gym! Link to comment
Batya33 Posted April 14, 2015 Share Posted April 14, 2015 Agree with Debrajulia (especially since she's my age!). I never cared for the body builder type of body but it wouldn't have been a dealbreaker. My husband and I are in our late 40s. Known him for over 20 years. It never mattered to me whether he had a "hot" body but it did matter that he cared about being in reasonable shape and now my focus is whether he's staying healthy overall. I am into fitness but not into the 6-pack abs thing and my husband is not looking for me to be into that or look "hot" in that particular way. I would definitely lose weight if you are only in your mid-30s and overweight - change your habits and lifestyle so that as you age it will be easier to stay a healthy weight because you'll have those good habits in place. Some women focus on whether a man has a hot body to the extent you are describing. My guess is that those women are either into fitness in an obsessive way (or it is their career and they want a personal life to match) or are not looking for anything potentially long term. Link to comment
Unreasonable Posted April 14, 2015 Share Posted April 14, 2015 Depends. Have you ever been considered "hot?" Even as a teenager? If not, I would probably go with other attributes as your selling points. Some people are just genetically good looking naturally, no matter the age, like George Cloony, etc. You aren't going to be walking around showing off your ripped abs in public or even on a first date. These things do not show up under a shirt. You can give a basic idea that you're fit, but that's about it. And being fit can NEVER hurt, unless maybe if you look like a 'roided out freak. If anything, do it for yourself, not as a "pick up chicks" thing. If you do that to get a girl, then let yourself go, that's bait and switch. Link to comment
Jeffbobo Posted April 14, 2015 Share Posted April 14, 2015 Mid 30's too old? Lol. I'm in my mid 40's. I'm not super bulked but I'm very toned and chiseled. I've been called hot, smok'n hot, sexy as hell, etc. I don't work on my body to "get chicks". I do it because it makes me feel good about myself and helps me accomplish the insane hobbies I have. Either way, attracting women is not all about being ripped. Ripped dudes are a dime a dozen. It's about what you bring to the table. Your value. Link to comment
relevart Posted April 14, 2015 Share Posted April 14, 2015 Mid 30s are fine, but by the late 30s, you're supposed to be balding with the start of a pot belly as you wear black socks with sandals and complain about the weather. SMH Link to comment
abitbroken Posted April 14, 2015 Share Posted April 14, 2015 If I lost 20-30 lbs, bulked up, would I be "hot"? Or would I still be an "old man" to women? What if I get my body looking great, but I still can't find women to be attracted to me? Are there men who have really good bodies in the mid-30's and still can't get women? Why would they not be able too? Are women who are close to our ages not care about a man's body then? I've decided to let go of my feelings on fighting against my fathers' wishes and do it for a different cause. Why not get in great shape and worry about if its too old to be "hot" later? If you are hesitating about getting in great shape because you can't get a guarantee women will be all over you if you do and that is why you don't want to get in great shape, then you are going about things in the wrong way. Get in great shape. You'll live longer. And be more confident. And who knows - you might meet women because they liked the shared activities of biking and travelling to run races. My cousin met his wife that way and he is not a perfect 10 by any stretch. Link to comment
abitbroken Posted April 14, 2015 Share Posted April 14, 2015 Is that a joke? ^ What do you mean??? Dougie always comes here asking if he should do something hoping for the guarantee that it will bring him women and if it doesn't guarantee that, he decides not to do it.. He should want to improve himself for himself. And yes, my cousin really did meet his wife that way. They are members of the same cycling group. Link to comment
brodus Posted April 14, 2015 Share Posted April 14, 2015 Sorry! It was the post above yours I was pointing at looks like we posted at the same time. Link to comment
happpybear Posted April 14, 2015 Share Posted April 14, 2015 I would re-frame it as getting in shape for the sake of your health and well-being, and not to look hot for the young chicks. When I meet a guy, regardless of age, and he is fit I don't automatically think "hot" I think wow he takes pride in his health and well being and that is hot, to me. It's not about shape either, he doesn't need to be a body builder, there are some wiry, lithe guys in my yoga classes who can bend like a pretzel, that takes dedication and respect for ones body, and that is hot... do it because you should, for you, not for anyone else. Link to comment
Doc Blaze Posted April 14, 2015 Share Posted April 14, 2015 I seriously dont even know what you want anymore..I dont think you even know what you really want anymore are you looking for a quick bang or gf material.... Ive known many girls who are perfect IMO on looks, they say one sentence and it kills the connection and attraction and they are no longer attractive to me because of their awful personality... I have some friends that girls think they are perfect, but cant get a gf because they are douches or just socially awkward.... Just because your hot wont make every girl want you...especially as you get older people want more to life because they start to think about their future and lifetime partners... FYI its never too late to start getting in shape and working out work out and work on yourself for yourself, not for others. Link to comment
John John Posted April 14, 2015 Share Posted April 14, 2015 Dougie having a "hot" body will help, but you have to back it up first and foremost. If that's all there is, a woman's interest will quickly wane. And please don't workout for women. If that's your sole source of motivation, you will give up quickly. I workout for myself because I love it and I like seeing my best possible self in the mirror. The compliments I get from women I date are just gravy. I will never let myself be out of shape! Link to comment
Blue Spiral Posted April 14, 2015 Share Posted April 14, 2015 Really?!?!? Mid 30's is too old? Some one better tell George Clooney or Brad Pitt that they aren't hot anymore or attractive to the opposite sex. You have to admit, they're outliers. Most men that age don't look as good as the two of them. Likewise, most 42-year-old women don't look as good as Sofia Vergara, and most 48-year-old women don't look as good as Salma Hayek. Now, obviously, this whole "people over the age of thirty are Officially Old" idea is antiquated thinking--and it's usually applied to women moreso than men, which isn't fair. I routinely see attractive everyday women all the way up until their mid-forties. But, more commonly, I see smoking-hot women in their mid-to-late-thirties. I think that individuals vary greatly, and that we shouldn't try to shoehorn them into some age-related definition. It really depends on the specific person. I have noticed a pattern, though: I'll call it the Britney Spears Phenomenon. This is a phenomenon in which the person (okay, I'll just say "woman", because I don't really pay attention to men) radically yo-yos back and forth between being attractive and being dumpy. I can't tell you how many women I've seen go through this. At 19, they're insanely hot...but, at 23, they've fallen apart...and then they get it back together in their late twenties...and then they lose it again in their mid-thirties. This is usually accompanied by major changes in their lives. Having kids, getting married/divorced, trying to find a new job, etc. I've known a lot of women that got married and had kids in their mid-to-late-twenties, and then got divorced, and decided to get the weight off and go back to college/get a new job. So they're thin and hard-working for a few years, and then the college thing/job thing falls apart and they gain the weight back. (This is usually when they come looking for me, because they want to be a housewife again, but they can no longer attract the quality of guys they used to attract. Ugh.) But, I'm rambling. I'm obviously biased, but, as a 36-year-old, I think I'm still pretty attractive--I've been continuing to have women flirt with me in public, for some strange reason. Unfortunately, as others have pointed out, this stuff isn't just about looks. I wish it were! When personality and money and the like come into it, well, that's where I run into trouble. And I suspect that the same would be true for Dougie, sadly. Link to comment
HeartGoesOn Posted April 14, 2015 Share Posted April 14, 2015 A hot body may get you in the door, but what's inside that hot body will keep you in the room. ^ your value, Dougie... Link to comment
jonny15 Posted April 14, 2015 Share Posted April 14, 2015 You're going to need a hot face to go along with the hot body to be hot. If only benching my face would help. haha Link to comment
jimthzz Posted April 14, 2015 Share Posted April 14, 2015 Hey, it is all a matter of perspective. I'm in my mid-50s and not even close to a work out freak, but in the few years since my divorce and remarriage, i got all the tail I could handle. then I met and married a great lady. Is she hot? By my scale, you bet. She is in her early 50s and filled with energy and enthusiasm, pretty too. But both of us are not what anyone in their 30s or 20s would even blink at. Hot is a subjective measurement and not even the only one that sparks romantic interest. Link to comment
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