TwixSense Posted February 13, 2015 Author Share Posted February 13, 2015 I'm 24. Yea I want kids but no I don't have any kids currently Link to comment
faraday Posted February 13, 2015 Share Posted February 13, 2015 I'm 24. Yea I want kids but no I don't have any kids currently Cool, I look forward to an update Link to comment
TwixSense Posted February 14, 2015 Author Share Posted February 14, 2015 Red got me Valentine's gifts Link to comment
TwixSense Posted February 19, 2015 Author Share Posted February 19, 2015 Red has a lot of female acquaintances Link to comment
TwixSense Posted February 20, 2015 Author Share Posted February 20, 2015 Not in a good place right now. My period is in a week. I am quitting my job. Midterms tomorrow. Its COLD outside. I missed a month of church. Andd I snooped in Red's phone I am so ridiculous sometimes Link to comment
faraday Posted February 20, 2015 Share Posted February 20, 2015 You either trust him or you don't. If you don't...you need to determine why. Is it specifically him? Or do you not trust any guy you date? Link to comment
TwixSense Posted February 20, 2015 Author Share Posted February 20, 2015 I do not like that most times we go to some store & he sees some girl he knows. So far its been 5 or 6 different places and each time he sees some girl. Also most of his FB friends are girls. I know this because I saw his Facebook. I'm just going to keep quiet and work on myself. Making new friends ( I found a really great church and they hang out every 2 weeks and the people there are great too). Also trying to lock down my work & school situation. Also summer is coming and I want my stomach to be more toned. I don't trust men in general. Link to comment
faraday Posted February 20, 2015 Share Posted February 20, 2015 If you don't trust men in general, you need to figure out why. Insecurity will plague every relationship you have until you've worked through it. What do you think caused this distrust of men? Solidifying the rest of your life is good. As for dating a guy that has a lot of girl friends...if you're insecure they're hard to date. My bf has more female friends than males ones....and at first it was harder because I didn't know him. Once I got to know his morals, his personality...the way he views the world...it's not even something I think about any more. I know he's good....so I trust him. And I've met his friends, and it's obvious there's nothing there...and that helps. How does Red interact with these women? Link to comment
TwixSense Posted February 20, 2015 Author Share Posted February 20, 2015 From what I've seen he acts normally with them as in nothing suspicious. But he hangs out with them when I'm not around so for all I know he could be acting differently. Idk Also the text that I saw said "ILY" and he replied "ILY too " was from a friend who I assume he's close with Idk I always seem to find dudes that do this flirting thing with multiple women and they say things that I find to be inappropriate. For example my ex did the same thing except worst like he was telling these women via text and FB " oh if I wasn't taken then xyz" and also in person he'd openly make sexual comments. For awhile I said nothing and sure enough the worst it got. Smh I think that there is something in me that attracts guys who need a lot of attention from women God forbid I did anything close to what they are doing, such as sending flirty texts or making sexual comments, or having hundreds of male friends on FB, I would literally have a male harem Link to comment
faraday Posted February 20, 2015 Share Posted February 20, 2015 It sounds like you like the way an insecure guy treats you. The insecure guy will buy presents early in the relationship, want to text often, spend an excessive amount of time together (more than a date or two a week), not want you to hang out with guy friends because they "don't trust other guys"...it will come accross as they really like you...they really care...but their emotion is disproportionate with how much time they've spent with you. You might be attracting them because you might be insecure. You two validate each other. But those types of guys don't make great partners because they need constant validation and from multiple places. It's something to think about. If this is a pattern for you, how do you plan on breaking it so you can be with a healthy man? Link to comment
TwixSense Posted February 20, 2015 Author Share Posted February 20, 2015 I don't have an answer yet. I'm trying to figure this out myself like 1) what is there in me that attracts these kinds of guys and 2) why do I need so much attention from a significant other I'm guessing its because my friendships & family relationships are lacking in closeness (its been like this for years) Link to comment
TwixSense Posted February 20, 2015 Author Share Posted February 20, 2015 Ugh I am so cranky and irritable and aggravated right now. Starting to think I'm more emotional than I thought. Link to comment
TwixSense Posted February 22, 2015 Author Share Posted February 22, 2015 Feeling like I committed too soon. Link to comment
TwixSense Posted February 23, 2015 Author Share Posted February 23, 2015 Wish Red would stop everything he's doing and reply when I text him Link to comment
faraday Posted February 23, 2015 Share Posted February 23, 2015 You're very all over the place. One minute it's moving too fast, the next he's not indulging you enough. What's up with that? Link to comment
TwixSense Posted March 7, 2015 Author Share Posted March 7, 2015 Faraday it's how I am emotionally.. Mentally I am one way, emotionally I am another... Usually I feel anxious, doubtful, bored, playful, horny, or curious, and I need a lot of attention in a relationship. So...Red and his brother helped me get a new job... So if I get this job maybe I can make some acquaintances and hang out after work ....Also I noticed that Red dropped off with the communication when we're apart, which I very much dislike. I noticed that somehow I attach the amount of attention from an SO as a function of his character and my self worth, and I realize that they are all mutually exclusive.... Just because he doesn't smother me with attention doesn't diminish my worth as a person, and the amount of attention he gives me isn't indicative of whether he has good character .... And then I realized that IDK who Red is at all! And I'm in an exclusive "relationship" with him! How am I supposed to know if he's a good guy or not? I don't like how any of this feels at all.. Link to comment
TwixSense Posted March 7, 2015 Author Share Posted March 7, 2015 If I could just feel 99% reassured that he's a good guy, and that he's truly interested in me within the context of a serious committed relationship, then I wouldn't feel upset that I don't hear from him every minute of the day. And right now I just don't feel that security Link to comment
missmarple Posted March 7, 2015 Share Posted March 7, 2015 And then I realized that IDK who Red is at all! And I'm in an exclusive "relationship" with him! How am I supposed to know if he's a good guy or not? I don't like how any of this feels at all.. Why don't you ask him what you feel you don't know about him? I've found that just letting someone talk (with a gentle push from me, of course) tells me a lot about their character. Link to comment
faraday Posted March 7, 2015 Share Posted March 7, 2015 Next time you're together, ask him if he's ever cheated. Ask him how his relationships have ended...or whatever else you're wondering. Then you can determine if he's trustworthy. But keep it short- under 10 minutes, and go back to talking about less serious stuff. When people are on the up and up and they like you, they generally don't mind a few questions to help you get to know them. You just don't want every hang out to be serious talks and about calming insecurities...it should be fun...ya know what I mean? Were you looking for a new job? It sounds like he likes you I think it's really hard in the beginning to not be insecure....and that's part of the attraction formula, right.? If we met someone and knew everything about them....the mystery, the fun would be gone. It becomes stable with time and consistency....so just take this time to get to know him and try to breathe! Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk Link to comment
TwixSense Posted April 20, 2015 Author Share Posted April 20, 2015 Well I ended up finding out that he cheated on 2 of his exes, he was sharing his background Link to comment
TwixSense Posted April 20, 2015 Author Share Posted April 20, 2015 We had a falling out regarding his phone only to get back together 3 days later Link to comment
WithLove Posted June 30, 2015 Share Posted June 30, 2015 I'm sorry, hun. Are you surprised? Link to comment
TwixSense Posted June 30, 2015 Author Share Posted June 30, 2015 No..... I feel so bad right now... Idk what I'm doing wrong that I attract these kinds of men in my life... Link to comment
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